Some believe governments should spend more money on improving roads and highways, while some think money should be spent improving public transportation, such as buses, trains, and subways. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

Some would argue that a huge portion of the country's budget should be used to develop streets and highways,
while
others believe that the biggest part of the government's money should be spent on Improving general transportation,like trains and
buses
.
This
essay will argue that
although
it is important to regenerate roads and parkways, upgrading public trans ways should be the main
place
to spend government money. On the one hand,even though it's significantly important to consider and work on improving the roads, it's not serving all
people
.They believe that, in order to save time, wider and new highways will make them avoid daily traffic in the old and unorganized ones.
Also
, they think it will reduce the accident rate and
dead
Replace the word
deaths
show examples
, where tight Streets and potholes something shouldn't be ignored because they can be the main cause , major of accidents where much of them hard to be seen
while
driving and with high speed
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
these ways,
people
could lose their life.
However
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
believe it should not be the right sector to be improved in the first
place
. On the other hand, public transportation important part of
people
, despite having their own car having some good sides , using
buses
, subways or trains to go to work or another
place
is frequently more beneficial. And some
people
support that
due to
saving money if they don't have their own cars, spending a lot of cash on taxis every day will cost them a lot and
as a result
getting
buses
or trains
preserve
Correct subject-verb agreement
preserves
show examples
human funds to use in something else primary for themselves.
For example
, in Australia, 75% of workers and students transiting by public
buses
. In conclusion, despite how Improving streets Impacts many sides citizens,travelling and using common transportation is more important and should be the main
place
the developed by country
Submitted by ghad17172002 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a logical flow, causing confusion in understanding the argument's progression. It needs a clear introductory paragraph that outlines the points that will be discussed, followed by well-structured body paragraphs that explore each point in depth. Lastly, a succinct conclusion summarizing the arguments made and reaffirming the writer's stance is necessary.
task achievement
The response to the task partially meets the requirements, with ideas being presented but not entirely clear or expanded upon. The argument needs to be more specific, providing clear and concrete examples to support the viewpoints discussed. The essay would benefit from a clear thesis statement and a conclusion that ties up the discussion, providing a clear opinion.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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