Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that the government should invest money in the
railways
instead
of the roads. Some people may say that the roads are more essential. I completely agree with the statement, as the rail lines reduce pollution in the air and prevent accidents that might happen.
To begin
with, funding for public transportation
such
as trains, trams, or buses is more eco-friendly and helps develop green travel in the country. The road vehicle is the main reason for increasing pollution all around the world.
While
they use the network links, they will bring more benefits to the environment.
For instance
, in Australia, the government is providing more funding for the tram in the city area so that citizens can travel to their destinations at cheap prices. That’s why it is more important to invest money in the
railways
to decrease air pollution.
Furthermore
,
railways
offer a safer commuting experience for both citizens and merchants. Recently, the number of accidents on the roads and highways has been increasing more and more.
Thus
, public transportation is faster than private cars, and people can manage the timetable more easily.
For example
, most people in Japan prefer to travel by train
due to
the rush times in the morning and afternoon, so they can go to work early.
Therefore
, improved
railways
would save valuable time
while
offering a safe mode of commuting for individuals and businesses. In conclusion, I believe that a government, either in a developed or a developing country, should invest to build a safer, faster, cheaper, and greener world, and
railways
,
for
this
reason, should be an obvious priority.
Submitted by mynonames on

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task achievement
Your essay maintains a clear position throughout, corresponding to the task requirements, yet you should aim for a more comprehensive response by including a discussion of the possible advantages of road investment, as a balanced view could enhance the depth of the essay. Also, be sure to fully develop your ideas to match the complexity of the question and illustrate them with a wider range of examples that show a more nuanced understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
You display basic logical sequencing of information and ideas, but greater cohesion could be achieved through a more varied use of cohesive devices. Aim to guide the reader through your argument by signposting your main points more clearly throughout the essay. The introduction and conclusion are present, which is positive, but these could be enhanced with more precise thesis statements and stronger summarizing skills. Continuing to work on these aspects will lead to a smoother and more coherent reading experience.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Carbon emissions
  • Mass transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Economic growth
  • Regional development
  • Initial investment
  • Feasibility
  • Flexibility
  • Rural areas
  • Integration
  • Sustainable
  • Efficiency
  • Infrastructure
  • Commuters
  • Public expenditure
  • Autonomous vehicles
  • Long-term investment
  • Accessibility
  • Connectivity
  • Modal shift
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