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Writing Samples
Band 7

The pie charts show how water is used in places around the world

The pie charts show how water is used in places around the world
The pie charts illustrate
water
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 utilization for a variety of reasons in six different places around the globe.
Overall
Linking Words
, agricultural
water
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 usage was dominant in South
America
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, Africa, Central East
Asia
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 and South East
Asia
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,
while
Linking Words
 North
America
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 and Europe reported that
water
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 was mainly used industrially. In South
America
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, Africa, Central East
Asia
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 and South East
Asia
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 agricultural
water
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use
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 was significant accounting for 71%, 84%, 88% and 81% respectively.
However
Linking Words
,
water
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 allocated for industrial purposes
were
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was
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 relatively low in each area with approximately 7%.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, all countries reported domestic
water
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use
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 was insignificant with
near
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nearly
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 7% each, with the exception of South
America
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 where it accounted for one-fifth of the total making it the second main reason for consumption in South
America
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. North
America
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 and Europe both exhibited a reliance on industrial
water
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use
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, accounting for half of the total in each region.
Moreover
Linking Words
, both places indicated that the
use
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 of
water
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 for domestic causes was the least popular at about 14 each and for agricultural purposes
around
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at around
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 35% in both regions.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, america, asia, use with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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