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Writing Samples /
Band 6

You recently booked a part-time course at a college. You now need to cancel your booking. Write a letter to the college administrator. In your letter •say which part-time course you booked •explain about booking a different course •ask about booking a different course

#course #college #administrator #•say #•explain #•ask
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to let you know that I am willing to cancel my enrollment in one of the upcoming programs and want to inquire about an alternative. It is the "Python for Data Analysis" that will be starting from the 1st of April. I hope you will consider my condition favourably. Let me explain my problem in more detail.
Although
,
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apply
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 the course itself is both up to date and well organised, the problem starts with my unforeseen work commitments. I have been working on two jobs spontaneously for the
last
 couple of years.
Moreover
, I have deadlines for certain tasks
this
 quarter which I need to address proactively.
Hence
, these days I am working 15 hours a day
due to
 conflict with my work I will not be able to attend the classes.
Therefore
, would you kindly withdraw my booking?
Nevertheless
, I want to foster my skills, definitely, I would like to continue my learning journey,
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in
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the next quarter. It is
therefore
 requested that please share a course that covers SQL query performance which is something I am looking for in future challenges. Thank you for your consideration. Yours faithfully, Haris Khan
Submitted by Haris Khan on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the beginning of your letter addresses the recipient appropriately and set a clear purpose for your writing in the opening paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Try to organize your ideas in a more logical sequence, ensuring that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph contains a single clear idea that is well-developed and supported with appropriate details.
task achievement
Address all three bullet points thoroughly. While you touched on all the required elements, expanding on them with more detail ensures a higher score.
task achievement
The tone is appropriate for a formal letter; however, ensure precise language and avoid overly casual expressions.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Dear Sir/Madam
  • I am writing to inform you
  • I recently booked a part-time course
  • unfortunately, I won't be able to attend
  • due to unforeseen circumstances
  • regretfully cancel my booking
  • I would like to inquire about
  • availability of a different course
  • alternative course options
  • similar course that better suits my needs
  • kindly provide information regarding
  • procedure for booking the alternative course
  • I would greatly appreciate your assistance
  • Thank you in advance
  • Please contact me at your earliest convenience
  • Sincerely
  • Name
  • Phone number
  • Email address
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