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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows global sales of the top five mobile phone brands between 2009 and 2013. Write a report for a university, lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

The chart below shows global sales of the top five mobile phone brands between 2009 and 2013. Write a report for a university, lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.
#sales #five #phone #brands #report #university #lecturer #information #summarise #features #comparisons
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The bar graph depicts the
sales
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 of a variety of brands in mobile phones (
Samsung
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, Apple,
Nokia
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,
LG
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, and ZTE) all over the world from 2009 until 2013.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clearly apparent that there is an upward trend in
sales
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 of
Samsung
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, and Apple cell phones,
in contrast
Linking Words
,
Nokia
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 and
LG
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 went down noticeably in less than 5 years. Turning to the
detail
Fix the agreement mistake
details
show examples
, in 2009
Nokia
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 was a leader in
sales
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, it reached almost 450
million
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sales
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 globally, meanwhile, other brands like Apple and ZTE just sold roughly 10
million
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 units in the same year.
Whereas
Linking Words
Samsung
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 was right behind. In 2009
Samsung
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 sold almost 230
million
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 units, and in 2013 it became the highest brand that sold mobile phones, it overtook
Nokia
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's position.
Nokia
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 and
LG
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,
on the
Linking Words
contrary
Add the comma(s)
contrary,
show examples
 their
sales
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 plummeted. In 2013
Nokia
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 just sold 250 pieces of cell phone and
LG
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 sold less than 100 units. When it comes to ZTE,
this
Linking Words
 brand has risen gradually but its
sales
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 are still under 100
million
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.
Submitted by nientjeninan on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, samsung, nokia, lg, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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