The charts below give information about children under 18learjing musical instruments in one region of the UK in 1996 and 2016.
The pie chart given compares
between
children who learned musical Change preposition
apply
instrument
and Fix the agreement mistake
instruments
who
did not, Correct determiner usage
those who
while
the bar chart elaborates which
instrument they played. Both of the data are in the year 1996 and 2016.
The thing that pops up the most is how musical Change preposition
on which
player
were much Fix the agreement mistake
players
dominating
in 2016 Correct quantifier usage
more dominating
to compare
with the previous year where it was only 44% of the Change the verb form
compared
populations
. More than that, the number in 2016 was Fix the agreement mistake
population
also
more diverse where there was almost threefold
Correct article usage
a threefold
of
difference when the ones who never learned Change preposition
apply
instrument
was only 24%. Correct article usage
an instrument
On the other hand
, the pie in 1996 showed the total of individuals almost equal on
choosing Change preposition
in
wether
they learn music or not where there was only Correct your spelling
whether
12
% Correct article usage
a 12
of
difference between each Change preposition
apply
numbers
.
The chart examines children's preference Change to a singular noun
number
Change preposition
for
on
Change preposition
for
Correct article usage
apply
the
music instrumental on both years. Based on the data, there was a contrast in 1996 where the children chose to play Correct article usage
apply
piano
rather than a keyboard like Change the article
the piano
the
most of the population in 2016. Correct article usage
apply
Furthermore
, there was also
similarity
where in Correct article usage
a similarity
the
both years approximately 10 people loved to play more than one Remove the article
apply
music
Replace the word
musical
instruments
. More than that, it is Fix the agreement mistake
instrument
also
known that there were still some child musician
who played other tools that were not mentioned in the data.Fix the agreement mistake
musicians
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "compares" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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