IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The following table contains information about average monthly highest and lowest temperatures in London and Manchester in a period of six months. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The given table depicts the information about the average highest and lowest
Use synonyms
temperature
Fix the agreement mistake
temperatures
show examples
 in London and Manchester
cities
Use synonyms
 within 6
months
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, July and August are the hottest
months
Use synonyms
 in
both
Use synonyms
cities
Use synonyms
 in the given 6
months
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, the
temperature
Use synonyms
 goes down towards the end of the year in
both
Use synonyms
cities
Use synonyms
To begin
Linking Words
 with, the highest and the lowest temperatures in London in
both
Use synonyms
 July and August are the same at 23C and 15C respectively.Considering the September and October
months
Use synonyms
, the highest recorded
temperature
Use synonyms
 is 20C
while
Linking Words
 the lowest is almost half of it at 10C.December is the coolest month within the given period and the average
temperature
Use synonyms
 varies between 5C to 9C. Moving to the data for Manchester , it is visible that the
temperature
Use synonyms
 of Manchester is cooler than London in the given period with almost the same figures for the highest and lowest temperatures in July and August at nearly 20C and 14C respectively.The
temperature
Use synonyms
 in November and December in Machester never goes higher than 9C.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the weather in December in
both
Use synonyms
cities
Use synonyms
 shows close similarities and the average
temperature
Use synonyms
 varies between 9C to 4C.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction & Conclusion
Ensure that the introduction provides a clear overview of the data presented in the table. Additionally, consider adding a conclusion that summarizes the main points of the data comparison.
Logical Structure
Try to organize the information in a more logically flowing structure. Use a variety of linking words and phrases to make the progression of ideas clearer and the text more cohesive.
Supported Main Points
The main points have been identified, but make sure to explore these points in greater depth. Provide more detailed comparisons and cover all significant data points where relevant.
Complete Response
Your response covers the task requirements, but work on expanding the details and explanations to fully satisfy the task achievement criterion. Coverage of all the key features, with appropriate detail, is necessary to score higher.
Clear & Comprehensive Ideas
While your essay contains relevant ideas, working on clearer articulation and development of those ideas will improve task achievement. Aim for comprehensive explanations without leaving out critical information.
Relevant & Specific Examples
Include more specific examples and data to support the points made in the essay. This will add to the preciseness of your response and improve the overall task achievement score.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: