IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#aim #science #people’s #lives
Science
 serves multiple objectives, from uncovering the mysteries of the universe to diving technological innovation.
While
 recognizing the breadth of these goals, I strongly agree foremost aim of
science
 should be to better human
lives
.
This
 essay will compare the various objectives of
science
 and argue why improving human welfare ultimately stands paramount. The drive to learn new
things
 is a big part of
science
. Studying
things
 like space or the human body gives us knowledge, which is valuable. But
this
 kind of
science
 might not help
people
 with their daily problems right away.
Conversely
, when
science
 solves real-world problems, like finding clean water in poor areas, it can change
people
’s
lives
 quickly.
This
 is why it is more important. Another goal of
science
 is to answer our questions about the world around us. We are naturally curious about
things
 like how plants grow or what stars are made of. A good example is looking at how bees find flowers.
This
 might not seem related to our
lives
, but it helps farmers grow better crops, which is really important for feeding
people
. So,
this
 kind of
science
 might not change our
lives
 right away, but it’s still very important because it can lead to big discoveries that help everyone. In conclusion,
while
science
 is about learning and creating new
things
, its best use is to improve
people
’s
lives
. Even though all goals of
science
 are important, the ones that help
people
 directly are the ones we should care about the most.
This
 is why making life better for
people
 should be the main aim of
science
.
Submitted by lawrencechan20 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph clearly follows from the previous one to enhance logical structure. Utilize a range of cohesive devices but take care that their use doesn't become mechanical.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to illustrate the points being made, as this helps to substantiate your arguments and demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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