Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Some individuals think that all

information

Use synonyms

from scientific research, business and the academic

world

Use synonyms

should be distributed freely to the masses,

while

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others believe that some

information

Use synonyms

is too valuable to be shared so relentlessly.

Although

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it may be reasonable to keep some data private, my stance on

this

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notion is to give people all possible

information

Use synonyms

for

them

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

to have a clear view of the way the

world

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is working.

To begin

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with, there are a couple of reasons why,

for example

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, individuals would prefer to keep some data private.

Firstly

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, big corporations hide receipts of their products or chip schemes to not give advantage to other companies in the market.

Secondly

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, advanced countries may not want to share their newest advances in scientific fields with their enemies.

For instance

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, Coca-Cola keeps their receipt of cola very

secretly

Change the word

secret

show examples

because

this

Linking Words

can affect its market share.

Also

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, it is important to mention that the US tried to retain any data regarding nuke bombs after

World

Use synonyms

War 2.

Nevertheless

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, the importance of sharing

information

Use synonyms

in all fields far outweighs its possible disadvantages. First of all, free access to

this

Linking Words

will benefit human civilization greatly in the long term, owing to the fact that global cooperation will encourage all gifted minds of the

world

Use synonyms

to make a concerted effort

for improving

Change preposition

to improve

show examples

our

world

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together.

Apart from

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this

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such

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accessability

Correct your spelling

accessibility

will give opportunities to all levels of society,

therefore

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some people from poor families can change their current condition of living. One clear example is the creation of the internet which gives infinite opportunities to everyone who wants to study any subject.

To sum up

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although

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the implementation of

this

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can harm some people from the upper class substantially,

but

Remove the conjunction

apply

show examples

a long-term effect will benefit the international community.

dnm.bestWed Jan 10 2024

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introduction conclusion present

While your essay includes an introduction and conclusion, it lacks a clear thesis statement, indicating your own position. Ensure your introduction explicitly states your viewpoint.

logical structure

Your essay attempts to organize ideas logically, but some transitions between points can be improved for better flow. Aim for clearer linking sentences between paragraphs to guide the reader through your argument.

supported main points

You have supported main points with explanations and examples. However, the examples used could be more specific and directly related to the topic. Use real-world, precise examples to strengthen your argument.

complete response

You addressed the prompt and provided a clear opinion, but the response could be developed further. Make sure each paragraph expands on your ideas comprehensively.

clear comprehensive ideas

The essay presents a recognized structure with an introductory paragraph, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Still, some ideas require clearer articulation and elaboration for a more comprehensive discussion. Developing and expanding on each point will create a more insightful essay.

relevant specific examples

Examples used are relevant, yet somewhat generic. For a higher band score, include more detailed and specific instances that convincingly support your points.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

295 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

information sharing
scientific research
business
academic world
advancement of knowledge
progress
collaboration
cross-disciplinary research
open access
democratization of information
transparency
credibility
intellectual property
security concerns
commercial interests

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Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays anyone can post news on the internet. As a result, we cannot trust information we read there. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Education and health care should be funded by the government and free for everyone. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?