Nowadays children are being encouraged to use computers and digital media to enhance their learning. Discuss the Advantages and disadvantages of this concept

These days, the trend of using digital
media
and
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
for
learning
Add an article
the learning
show examples
process is being expanded in terms of
children
.
This
phenomenon has advantages and disadvantages and both
side
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sides
show examples
will be discussed in
this
essay. To start off with, using digital
media
and
computer
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computers
show examples
offers us the opportunity to access
information
easily. It is well
known
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well-known
show examples
fact that people who are
well informed
Add a hyphen
well-informed
show examples
,
thereby having
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
more certainty in life. Without these
devices
, it is almost impossible to find the
requisited
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required
information
because there are tons of
datas
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data
in
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on
show examples
the internet.
Therefore
, digital
devices
should be suggested for
learning
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the learning
show examples
process in
this
fast-paced and
information
exploided
Correct your spelling
exploited
exploded
modern era. Another advantage is
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
its convenience. There is no need to buy or carry books or newspapers in order to access
information
or learn something new as it was in the past. In
this
digitalization era, there are many educational contents and e-books,
therefore
, just clicking one button is possible to reveal those materials.
In other words
, having
computer
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a computer
show examples
or digital
media
means a huge library with millions of books that you own.
Above all
, using
computer
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computers
show examples
and digital
media
helps to expand
children
's knowledge.
For example
,
children
having
computer
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computers
show examples
can study from their home or wherever they are.
For example
, during
covid
Correct your spelling
the
pandemic,
children
need to study
on
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apply
show examples
e-learning.
As a result
, some
children
can not get educated because they
did
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
not have digital
devices
. It is recognized that using
computer
Add an article
a computer
the computer
show examples
can be harmful
for
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to
show examples
childrens
Change to a genitive case
children's
show examples
health condition, especially in eyesight affection, because focusing eyes at the same distance point for long periods of time causes fatigue.
However
, it is preventative when parents should put sensible time limits on their
children
’s
computer
use and
video-game
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video game
show examples
playing. In conclusion, having considered both views, using digital
devices
and
media
is crucial for
children
studying in
this
technological era.
However
, parents need to set
Add an article
a time-limit
show examples
time-limit
Correct your spelling
time limit
show examples
on their usage, unless
this
digital habit would be harmful to
children
's eyesight.
Submitted by zayashdee on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical flow of ideas throughout the essay, including a distinct introductory statement and a summarizing conclusion. The introduction should more precisely address the task question, while the conclusion should provide a balanced summary without introducing new arguments.
coherence cohesion
Support main points with detailed explanations and specific examples. While the essay does present some examples and explanations, further specificity and elaboration will enrich the argumentation, leading to a more compelling discussion of the topic.
task achievement
Develop a clear position throughout your essay. While you've provided a brief discussion of advantages and disadvantages, ensure that you elaborate on each point sufficiently to demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic. Moreover, to achieve a higher score, you should provide a more substantial conclusion that encapsulates all the points made and relates back to the topic without introducing new information.
task achievement
Avoid general statements and focus on being specific in providing examples and explanations. Generalizations can make the arguments less persuasive and the essay's position less clear. Ensure that the advantages and disadvantages are explored with equal depth and that your reasoning is specific to the given topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • digital literacy
  • multimedia content
  • flexible and comprehensive education
  • interactive learning
  • knowledge retention
  • over-reliance
  • traditional learning skills
  • screen time
  • health impacts
  • cybersecurity risks
  • digital divide
  • inappropriate content
  • supervised learning
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