Many employees are able to work at home due to modern technology. Some people claim that it can benefit only the workers, not the employers. Is it a positive or negative development?

#employees #work #home #technology #people #benefit #workers #employers #development

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Advancing in technology makes communication become easier nowadays. We can

work

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home

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without going to the workplace.

This

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benefits both an

employee

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and an

employer

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, but

also

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has some drawbacks. So, in my opinion,

this

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development is on the positive side rather than

negative

Add an article

the negative

show examples

side. First of all, when working from

home

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, an

employee

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can save cost and time spent on travelling back and forth.

For example

Linking Words

, it usually takes about 1 hour for an office worker to reach his office with travel fares of around 100 Baht and it is the same for vice versa. If he can

work

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home

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, he can save 200 Baht and 2 hours a day.

Change preposition

From

show examples

employer

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's aspect, having his

employee

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work

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home

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has

Verb problem

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a good point too. Having fewer employees at a workplace means fewer usages of water ,electricity and some accommodations provided by a

company

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such

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

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free foods, snacks and drinks.

For

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this

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reason, it can help a

company

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to reduce its expense.

On the other hand

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, working at

home

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could affect efficiency. To illustrate, when working at

home

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, there's no one to

come

Verb problem

apply

show examples

check on you whether you are working or not. So one might be slacking off all day without getting any

work

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done.

Moreover

Linking Words

, when the

work

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isn't going smoothly, it has negative outcomes for a

company

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and an

employer

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to give

Verb problem

for

show examples

examples

Fix the agreement mistake

example

show examples

drop

Correct article usage

a drop

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in quality ,profit loss and dissatisfaction of customers. In conclusion, working at

home

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has good points for both an

employee

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and an

employer

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. An

employee

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doesn't have to waste his life being on the road for 2 hours a day.

While

Linking Words

employer

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saves money spent on the

company

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's facilities. But working at

home

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may reduce the quality of

work

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too.

Therefore

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this

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development is more on the positive side with a little bit

drawback

Change preposition

of drawback

show examples

Submitted by Ze.Nin3.R0 on Thu Jan 11 2024

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coherence cohesion

Your introduction provides a reasonable setup for the essay, but the concluding paragraph could use a more definitive stance to more effectively bookend the discussion. The structure of the essay seems mostly logical, yet transitions between some ideas and paragraphs could be smoother. Pronouns and cohesive devices are generally used well, but some ideas could be expanded upon for clearer linkage.

task achievement

The essay reflects some understanding of the topic with an attempt to cover both positives and negatives of the argument. However, there is a need for more precise and varied examples to fully support the points made. The overall position is somewhat clear, but it lacks a strong, well-explained argument, especially in the conclusion, to fulfill the task requirements effectively. Consider balancing the coverage of points for both employees and employers and ensure the question prompt is directly and completely addressed.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

305 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

remote work
telecommuting
flexible working hours
overhead costs
corporate social responsibility
employee retention
carbon footprint
global talent pool
peak productivity times
job satisfaction

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Many employees are able to work at home due to modern technology. Some people claim that it can benefit only the workers, not the employers. Is it a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

"The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?"

The nuclear family is well adapted to moving due to its size. Do you think children benefit in any way from moving? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like Science and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that the computer and the Internet are important in children's studies, but others think that students can learn more effectively in schools and with teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Food travels thousand of miles from far to consumer. Some people think it could be better to our enviroment and economic of people only are local produced food. What are the advantages and disadvantages?