Some people say that in the modern world it is very difficult for people to have a healthy lifestyle. Others,however, say that it is easy for people to be healthy and fit if they want to be. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Nowadays, society is debating
either
Correct word choice
whether
show examples
people
are facing problems
while
living
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
show examples
lifestyle or now in modern times. From my perspective, it is easier for a person to live
healthy
Add an article
a healthy
show examples
lifestyle if they are truly willing. I am discussing both
point
Change to a plural noun
points
show examples
of
views
Fix the agreement mistake
view
show examples
in
upcmoing
Correct your spelling
upcoming
paragraphs with solid examples to support my opinion. Living a healthy lifestyle in
this
era of technology is much
convenient
Correct quantifier usage
more convenient
show examples
. One of the illustrations of
this
is health instructors nowadays are using
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
in order to spread their fitness knowledge among other
people
. As
matter
Correct article usage
a matter
show examples
of fact,
fast paced
Add a hyphen
fast-paced
show examples
technology
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
made it quite convenient for
people
to access these tutorials from anywhere. They
are conducting
Wrong verb form
conduct
show examples
live online sessions for their clients that too as per their free schedule and availability.
Secondly
, many food companies these days have created
such
meals which are rich in
nutritient
Correct your spelling
nutrients
.
For instance
, energy bars made out of cereals and several
micronutritients
Correct your spelling
micronutrients
are
getting
Verb problem
being
show examples
sold in many stores. These bars
contains
Change the verb form
contain
show examples
protiens
Correct your spelling
proteins
protein
, carbohydrates and other
fibers
Change the spelling
fibres
show examples
.
Moreover
, it is hard to point out whether these meals are less effective than real ones.
While
modern
Add an article
the modern
show examples
world has
offer
Change the verb form
offered
show examples
many healthy resources to the
people
, it has
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
show examples
too.
For example
, scientists these days are growing vegetables from artificial feed.
This
kind of process sometimes involves the inclusion of chemicals which increases the growth time of vegetables.
Although
, they claim it to be safe for
people
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
this
kind of practice sometimes leads to serious health
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
. In
addtion
Correct your spelling
addition
to that, some meat companies are using
steriods
Correct your spelling
steroids
steroid
injections to increase the
overall
growth process of some animals.
Main
Change the article
The main
show examples
example of
this
practice is chickens growing in farms these days. These chickens
seems
Change the verb form
seem
show examples
to be healthy in
overall
looks but
amount
Add an article
the amount
show examples
of
protiens
Correct your spelling
proteins
consider
Wrong verb form
is considered
show examples
to be zero.
However
, they
fulfills
Change the verb form
fulfill
show examples
the
need
Fix the agreement mistake
needs
show examples
of
person
Add an article
a person
show examples
for
time
Correct article usage
the time
show examples
being but
does
Correct subject-verb agreement
do
show examples
not give any authentic benefit
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
long run.
To sum up
, health is a serious concern among societies in a recent time. In my opinion,
people
have more facilities in
this
modern world to keep themselves
helathy
Correct your spelling
healthy
. There are drawbacks but with enough attention and care individuals can take benefits of technology and live a
helathy
Correct your spelling
healthy
life if they are actually willing to.
Submitted by araibbutt93 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic, but the response could be more fully developed. Aim to expand on your ideas further and ensure you provide a clear position throughout the essay, especially in the introduction and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical flow of your essay. Ideas should be organized and paragraphs should be well-structured with clear topic sentences that introduce the central idea of each paragraph. Use connecting words to enhance coherence.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!