Nowadays more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What are the reasons? What are the solutions for this problem?
It is undeniable that
people
are putting some important decisions on hold these days due to
their hectic schedule
and Fix the agreement mistake
schedules
also
giving birth has become a later decision Rephrase
apply
too
in Rephrase
apply
people
's lives. I will discuss the reasons that
why Correct word choice
apply
people
decide to have a child in later life as well as
some remedies to tackle this
obstacle in the upcoming paragraphs.
To begin
with, first
and foremost reason Correct article usage
the first
about
having Change preposition
for
children
in later life is inflation. This
means that market prices and education
budgets have been increased in these years
and people
are not strong financially
to fulfill their needs Rephrase
enough financially
as well
as
they are not able to pay school fees in earlier Correct word choice
and
years
of marriage. In Africa, for example
, couple
decides to have a baby after four Add an article
the couple
a couple
years
of marriage as they start allocating money in earlier years
of marriage to provide a good education
to their offsprings
in Fix the agreement mistake
offspring
coming
times. Correct article usage
the coming
Hence
, children
's demands are 60% higher than previous
generations, Change preposition
in previous
therefore
, parents have to work more years
to reach on
that level so that they Change preposition
apply
could
take responsibility Wrong verb form
can
of
a child.
To mitigate Change preposition
for
this
problem, this
issue requires the intervention of the government because if inflation is decreased then
stress might be reduced in individuals
life and Change noun form
individuals'
individual's
people
would work less
hours and can think about Change the quantifier
fewer
children
in earlier years
. Secondly
, providing free education
until secondary school assists parents to not concerning
about Replace the word
concern
education
burden of their Correct article usage
the education
children
then
they will be excited to increase family members because they would not have any worries about expensive tuition fees. In addition
to this
, medical services must aware
women about certain ages of pregnancy as if ladies opt to have a baby after Add a missing verb
be aware
thirty five
Add a hyphen
thirty-five
years
then
there could be some complications in this
process.
In conclusion, although
higher costs of products and school fees are the cause of delay
in pregnancy Fix the agreement mistake
delays
but
these obstacles can be mitigated by providing awareness about it Remove the conjunction
apply
as well as
reducing costs of everything and assisting people
in
expenses by Change preposition
with
government
.Correct article usage
the government
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task achievement
Make sure your essay directly addresses all parts of the task. The question asks for both reasons and solutions, and while you provided both, the solutions could be more developed and connected back to the reasons.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas more clearly. Introduce your main points in your introduction, and have paragraphs with clear topic sentences. Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea.
task achievement
Use specific examples that directly support your points. While you mention Africa and the government, you could strengthen your argument by providing concrete examples or data.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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