It is common aspiration among many young peopleto run their own business, rather than work for an employer. Do you think the advantages of working for yourself outweigh the drawbacks?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Recent times have, no doubt, witnessed that youth do not want to

work

Use synonyms

under any employer and

instead

Linking Words

, they have a very high desire to start their own line of something to make

money

Use synonyms

While

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

there are many possible reasons which fascinate young individuals towards

this

Linking Words

idea, one can not ignore the disadvantages. In my point of view, there are several downsides to

this

Linking Words

approach which will be discussed in

this

Linking Words

essay. There are many factors that decide your occupation and the most compelling one is the capital amount in hand and the risk one is ready to take. Starting your own business requires a lot of investment and there is always a danger of things not working out the way they are expected to. Let's take a group of friends

for example

Linking Words

who want to open a gym which requires a fair deal of

money

Use synonyms

. Even though they put that

money

Use synonyms

towards their goal, there is always a risk that it might not be successful and eventually a large sum of

money

Use synonyms

will go wasted.

Additionally

Linking Words

, opening your own business requires a lot of hard

work

Use synonyms

, intelligence, strategy and negligible personal hours. That being said, the idea of opening your own line of

work

Use synonyms

is not as bad as it seems. When you

work

Use synonyms

as a full/part-time employee for an organisation, you are basically helping an already

successfulcompany

Correct your spelling

successful company

successful-company

become better on the same salary, it is like someone is profiting from your hard

work

Use synonyms

Furthermore

Linking Words

, it might be very difficult in the beginning to open a startup, but if your ideas are good with a little help of luck, your hard

work

Use synonyms

might pay off. To recapitulate, both the pros and cons of

this

Linking Words

argument are similar and young people should consider these

factor

Fix the agreement mistake

factors

show examples

very carefully before choosing the right career path

jahnvijindal55Sat Jan 13 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement

Ensure you clearly present your main points with specific and relevant examples to each point made, elaborating more on each idea.

Coherence & Cohesion

Aim for a logical structure that guides the reader from introduction through to a conclusive end, ensuring your essay flows smoothly and thoughts are organized.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

303 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some people believe that governments should ban dangerous sports. Others claim that they should have freedom to choose their favourite activities. Discuss both views and present your opinion.
The prevalence of dangerous sports has sparked a heated debate, with some arguing that the government should enact a law that prohibits such activities, while others thought that sportsmen should have the freedom to choose. While there are merits to both sides of the argument, I firmly believe that people have the right to choose as they see fit.
6.5
band
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some ways. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
In the modern marketing landscape, trailblazing advertising strategies are essential for businesses to captivate their target audience and remain competitive. This essay will first suggest that consumer appeal and brand differentiation are the two foremost reasons, and I believe that this is a positive trend as it will enhance consumer satisfaction and make the market empathetic and adaptable.
7.5
band
Write a letter to the company that sold you the item. In the letter: * give details about the order you made * explain what was wrong with the item * tell the company what you want them to do about it
I am writing to express my dissatisfaction with the product I recently purchased from your Company.
6.5
band
Nowadays, there is a trend that reports of media focus on problems and emergencies rather than positive development. Some people think it is harmful to individuals and to society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
At present, a lot of news agencies are more likely to inform the story that concentrates on negative aspects rather than positive aspects. In this way, an enormous news receiver argued that it is damaging both the person and the overview of the community. I partially agree with these reasons, because I think that there are both positive and negative sides to this matter. To elaborate this more clearly, I will provide my point of view in the following paragraphs.
6.5
band
Some people say that Reading books improves imagination of people and improves their language skills while others say watching TV helps. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
While some people believe that reading books helps to build one's imagination and improve their language. Others argue that watching TV helps to attain such skills. Although it's true that such skills can be obtained while watching TV or reading books, I strongly believe that it depends on the type of learner.

It is common aspiration among many young peopleto run their own business, rather than work for an employer. Do you think the advantages of working for yourself outweigh the drawbacks?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people believe that governments should ban dangerous sports. Others claim that they should have freedom to choose their favourite activities. Discuss both views and present your opinion.

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some ways. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Write a letter to the company that sold you the item. In the letter: * give details about the order you made * explain what was wrong with the item * tell the company what you want them to do about it

Nowadays, there is a trend that reports of media focus on problems and emergencies rather than positive development. Some people think it is harmful to individuals and to society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that Reading books improves imagination of people and improves their language skills while others say watching TV helps. To what extent do you agree or disagree.