Some parents claim that advertisements are misleading for children while others allege that they provide useful information. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.
Some argue that the
advertisements
are misleading children
, while
others claim that they are useful information
. Nowadays, commercials
create awareness, and it is easy to manipulate children
.
To begin
with, the advertisements
impart various information
to the children
, like their usage and their importance to them. Despite making accusations in advertisements
, it is vital to understand the concept of commercials
. Whereas
, they provide information
about discounts, and the customers can take advantage of them. For instance
, if the children
see an advertisement for an online course with a discount on it, it could benefit them more than investing money without knowing that. To reiterate, without commercials
, it is harder to know about the products and could lose many advantages.
On the other hand
, advertisements
can easily influence children
and make them think they are irrational. Because children
are sensitive and easy to manipulate, they are also
captivated by those advertisements
. These days, organisations target children
to make profits instead
of making purposeful ads. For example
, a survey conducted in one region found that an advertisement for the drug made a skyrocketing profit by establishing that ad. Notably, those drugs were used by minors a lot. These kinds of misleading children
in those manners are increasing nowadays. Thus
, many people argue that these kinds of advertisements
should be considered illicit.
To conclude
, in my perspective, it is essential to understand and teach children
about commercials
. If the children
start to understand the real conception of advertisements
, there won’t be any misleading information
. Therefore
, proper guidance should be given to the children
.Submitted by insighttribez on
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Task Achievement
The essay lacks a fully developed introduction and conclusion. These are essential for framing your discussion and summarizing your main points and opinion. Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines the views you will discuss, and your conclusion effectively summarizes your discussion and clearly states your opinion.
Task Achievement
The ideas presented in the essay need to be more developed and expanded upon with clear and relevant examples. Each paragraph should contain one main idea and supporting details that demonstrate your understanding of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
The logical flow between ideas and paragraphs could be improved. Make more effective use of cohesive devices such as linking words and transition phrases to create a smoother narrative that is easier to follow.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on paragraph structuring to clearly distinguish between different points of view. Each paragraph should focus on a single aspect of the argument, providing a clear and comprehensive exploration of that point.
Language Proficiency
Be vigilant about grammar and vocabulary errors as they can obfuscate your arguments and reduce the clarity of your essay. Regular practice and review of grammar rules can be beneficial.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?