2.Nowadays, people have developed poor eating habits and do not eat balanced diet. What are the reasons behind this? Suggest possible solutions to control this

Today,
people
in big cities face the problem of having unhealthy and less nutritious diets
also
often skip their meals.
This
essay aims to give the reason for
this
situation and
also
put toward for solution. There are several primary reasons why
people
adopt fast
food
rather than balanced nutrient
food
. The busy
schedule
and a sequence of meetings for the
people
who work in the big city often make it difficult to take a rest and eat a proper meal.
For example
,
people
who work at the agency, often overwork until midnight to prepare the project, they might skip lunch and for dinner, they tend to choose to order simple
food
like junk
food
.
In addition
, the influence of their idol can make an impact on public perspectives. South Korean pop (
Kpop
Correct your spelling
K-pop
) idols have a big impact on how
people
look after their bodies, making them want to have that kind of
body
goal like their idols.
For example
, a
kpop
Correct your spelling
K-pop
pop
girl
grup
Correct your spelling
group
called Blackpink became a trend and made the majority of
girl
Fix the agreement mistake
girls
show examples
want to have that skinny
body
goal like them.
People
who have a busy hustle life should take more care of their health since skipping meals and eating unbalanced nutrients can have a bad impact on them. The company should strictly make a
schedule
for meal
time
as a priority as the meeting, to make the rest
time
essential.
For example
, the company can make rest
time
from 12 am until 1 pm as a free agenda, so the workers can have sufficient
time
for lunch.
Also
, the public through social media like Instagram and
twitter
Capitalize word
Twitter
show examples
should take an awareness that beauty can come from everyone whatever their
body
shape as long as at a healthy level. Love
ourself
Capitalize word
Ourself
show examples
champagne can broaden
people
’s views and they will start to love their bodies and have a good diet. In conclusion, the reason behind the increasing number of
people
who skip their meals can come from their busy
schedule
work and their perspective of
body
goals from their idols, possible solutions are to make a meal
schedule
by the company and spread public awareness through social media to make
people
love themselves more.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
It's important that both an introduction and a conclusion are included in the essay. Make sure that the introduction clearly presents the topic and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed without presenting new information.
coherence cohesion
For main points to be well-supported, you need to include detailed explanations, examples, or evidence that back up your claims. Avoid making general statements without showing exactly how they relate to the topic.
task achievement
To address the task more completely, make sure you respond to all parts of the question. The essay gave reasons but could have expanded more on solutions. Solutions presented should be direct responses to the problems discussed and could be developed further.
task achievement
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task achievement
Using relevant and specific examples strengthens your arguments. Ensure that the examples you provide directly illustrate the points you're making and that they're thoroughly explained and relevant to the prompt.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • balanced diet
  • poor eating habits
  • unhealthy food
  • fast food
  • convenience
  • advertising
  • nutrition
  • financial constraints
  • emotional eating
  • peer pressure
  • hectic work schedules
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • junk food
  • processed food
  • nutrient-rich
  • obesity
  • health consequences
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