IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the different modes of transport used to travel to and from work in one European city in 1960, 1980 and 2000. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below.

The graph below shows the different modes of transport used to travel to and from work in one European city in 1960, 1980 and 2000. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below.
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The bar chart illustrates different transport modes
such
Linking Words
 as bus,
car
Use synonyms
, bike and foot that have been used for working and travelling in a city in Europe from 1960 to 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, the proportion of
Use synonyms
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
 was the largest in 2000
while
Linking Words
 the lowest one was
also
Linking Words
Use synonyms
car
Correct article usage
the car
show examples
 in 1960.
Other kind
Change the wording
Another kind
Other kinds
show examples
 of transport shows big differences. It can be seen that more than 30% of people chose
going
Change the verb form
to go
show examples
 to work
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
 foot
while
Linking Words
 fewer citizens used
Use synonyms
car
Correct article usage
a car
show examples
 which was less than 10% in 1960. Buses and bikes have no big differences only around 8%.
Besides
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, in 1980, more than one-quarter of people were going out by
car
Use synonyms
 which was the most picked transportation
whereas
Linking Words
 a share of walking
was not show
Change the verb form
was not shown
show examples
competion
Correct your spelling
competition
 to other transport. In 2000, riding
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
Use synonyms
car
Add an article
the car
a car
show examples
 had the biggest percentage which was 36%,
this
Linking Words
 is similar to
travel
Wrong verb form
travelling
show examples
 by walking in 1960. The second place is bus
then
Linking Words
 bikes and foot show similar patterns, only less than 10% difference.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words car with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "differences" was used 3 times.
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