IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

3.Some experts say for road safety cyclists should pass a test before being allowed on public roads. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#experts #road #safety #cyclists #test #roads
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It has been proposed by experts that passing a test for those who ride a bike should be compulsory in order to be allowed to cycle
in
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apply
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on public roads. I totally agree with the idea of enforcing a regulation regarding the success of
cyclists
Use synonyms
’ examination
cyclists
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’ examination success. It is my view that
such
Linking Words
 determinations can effectively reduce the rate of mortality
that is
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 which are prevalent
as a result
Linking Words
 of reckless cycling. There can be some training prior to taking the test to ensure each cyclist is able to ride the bicycle properly and
whether
Correct word choice
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they are familiar with all regulations. If governments force
cyclists
Use synonyms
twist
Fix the infinitive
to twist
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 their
arm
Fix the agreement mistake
arms
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 to attend these classes, there would be
a the
Choose an article
a
the
show examples
 reduction in
of
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accidents
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, it has been reported that
cyclists
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 are accountable for 50% of road
accidents
Use synonyms
 in recent years and
this
Linking Words
 number is expected to rise will have been risen by the next year as the investigations show.
In contrast
Linking Words
, some people claim that setting tests can be a waste of time and money and may put
cyclists
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 and
the
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apply
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society in trouble. They firmly insist that some of the people who ride a bicycle once in a blue moon need neither to learn regulations for safety reasons nor pass any test.
However
Linking Words
, I do not find
this
Linking Words
 argument as convincing as it appears to overlook the long-term effects of pre-measures for road safety.
For example
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, the more limitations are imposed by city planners and transport officials, the more life is saved from road
accidents
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 and the
less
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fewer
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 expenditures are needed for healthcare measures. In conclusion, I completely agree with testing
cyclists
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 because it can reduce
loss
Correct article usage
the loss
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 of life
as a result
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 of
accidents
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as well as
Linking Words
 reduce the cost of damages.
Submitted by m.r.zamani1376678 on

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introduction conclusion present
The essay introduces the topic fairly well, but the conclusion could be strengthened by restating your position in a clearer way and summarizing the main points. Additionally, ensure that your introduction includes a clear thesis statement that reflects your opinion on the topic.
supported main points
Your main points should be better explained and developed. Provide more specific examples to support your arguments. The examples given are a bit vague and do not clearly support the points made. You need to illustrate your arguments with clear, relevant examples and develop each point fully.
complete response
The essay shows partial response to the task with a clear position; however, it could be more fully extended. Ensure that all parts of the prompt are addressed thoroughly, and that your opinion on the matter permeates the essay more clearly. Furthermore, the essay slightly drifts from the main topic by discussing governmental expenditures on healthcare, which is only indirectly related to the question of road safety for cyclists.
logical structure
Make sure your ideas are clearly and logically organized. The use of linking words is adequate, but some sentences are overly complex and could be made clearer. Work on presenting arguments in a more structured and logical way. For coherence, it is important that your writing flows well and that each paragraph smoothly transitions to the next.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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