Directors of large organizations earn much higher salaries than ordinary employees do. Some people believe it is necessary, but others think that it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

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People have different views about whether holders of top-spot positions in big firms should be paid more or as equal as ordinary employees.
While
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it may seem unfair that managers earn more money, I completely agree that
this
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is the right payment strategy. There are several reasons to support the higher income rates of the managers.
Firstly
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, these seniors are the most experienced and even the most educated employees in every organization and they have struggled to get to that position.
Secondly
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, they hold the burden of responsibility.
That is
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, they are in charge of every decision and any possible bad outcome of those decisions and they should make the company run smoothly.
Finally
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, they need to work for longer hours and even harder than ordinary workers.
That is
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why I believe that they deserve higher income rates.
On the other hand
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, ordinary workers are less responsible and they need to handle less-complicated limited tasks.What they do has less impact on the whole outcome of the company.
Furthermore
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, they do not need to make smart decisions that may change the
overall
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situation of the firm.They deal with lower levels of stress and they have more flexibility in working hours and they
also
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enjoy more free time in the day.
In addition
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, it is a general rule in nearly all organizations to pay less to ordinary staff because they are mostly in their junior years of working and paying equal payment will discourage their hunger to grow. In conclusion, I believe that managers should get higher wages compared to other workers in the organizations.
Submitted by sajad.bazdar.2012 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear logical structure by using stronger transition words between ideas to improve the logical progression of arguments.
coherence cohesion
Include an introduction that clearly paraphrases the essay question and outlines the structure of the essay. Additionally, ensure that your conclusion restates your opinion to solidify your argument effectively.
coherence cohesion
To support your main points more effectively, provide detailed examples and evidence. This will strengthen your argument and make your essay more convincing.
task achievement
While you did provide a complete response to the prompt, your essay could benefit from expanding on the ideas presented to display a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Work on the clarity of your ideas. Make sure that each paragraph has one clear main idea with supporting information that is easy to follow.
task achievement
Incorporate relevant, specific examples to substantiate your claims. This includes real-world instances, case studies, or hypothetical scenarios that directly relate to your points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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