The rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. Do the advantages of using sociak media for commucation outweigh the disadvantages?
The social
Correct article usage
Social
media
rising
has social and personal relationships Verb problem
apply
affect
as a whole. Verb problem
apply
This
writer argues that the advantage of getting in touch easily is overshadowed by the drawbacks of lack Change preposition
of face-to-ace
face-to-ace
communication and Correct your spelling
face-to-face
get
distraction.
The foremost benefit of using social Verb problem
apply
media
is that people
on
all around the world can contact each other easier and more Change preposition
apply
efficiency
. Before the invention of technology like social Replace the word
efficiently
media
, people
used to write letters to talk to another person in
a far distance, but it took a long period for receivers to get the mail. Change preposition
at
However
, individuals can communicate more efficiency
just by a few Replace the word
efficiently
second
to type and send, on the other side, receivers can get it within a second. Take a look Fix the agreement mistake
seconds
from Covid-19
pandemic, citizens were forbidden from going out by the local distancing rule, social Correct your spelling
at the COVID-19
media
played a vital role in bringing everyone together.
Nevertheless
, the disadvantages
of communicating through social Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantage
media
is experience
Wrong verb form
experiencing
lack
of face-to-face talk. Because of the innovation of smartphones, individuals can video call their relatives and friends, Correct article usage
a lack
however
, if they rely on them too much, they could easily lose their relationships because they don’t have “physical interaction”. For instance
, if a company want to cooperate with other companies, they would have a meeting rather than sitting in a room and call
each other.
Another drawback Wrong verb form
calling
could
be considered is getting Correct pronoun usage
that could
distraction
Replace the word
distracted
the
work. Many Change preposition
from the
people
, especially students, are distracted from their studies because of chatting, it is now providing them to make lots of relationships with various people
. Having wide
range of friends all around you could be good but don’t let them affect your life and work.
In conclusion, using social Add an article
a wide
media
to communicate is one of the best way
to get in touch with others but it Change to a plural noun
ways
was
outweighed by the lack of face-to-face interaction and Wrong verb form
is
getting
distraction.Verb problem
apply
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coherence cohesion
The essay does not adequately adhere to the standards of the IELTS writing tasks in terms of grammatical range, lexical resource, or clarity. It is crucial that the writing be well-structured with logical sequencing of ideas, varied sentence structures, and proper use of vocabulary to achieve cohesiveness and coherence. Additionally, ensure that the introduction and conclusion are clear and summarise the main points effectively.
task achievement
Task achievement could be improved by directly addressing the essay prompt, ensuring all parts are fully answered, and providing specific examples that are fully developed. Aim to present a clear position throughout the response, with cohesive arguments supporting this position.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.