Some people argue that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their health and diet, while others believe that governments should be responsible for it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #responsibility #individuals #care #health #diet #governments

In these modern days, everyone is busy

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with

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their jobs and studies,

health

issues are

increacing

Correct your spelling

increasing

at an

arlaming

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alarming

rate in many societies around the world. Some

people

argue that governments should take care of their

health

and diet. I strongly disagree with that view and

belive

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believe

show examples

it is individuals'

responsibilities

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responsibility

show examples

. First of all, there is no doubt that if we have any

health

issues, we are the

one

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ones

show examples

who suffer from these problems.

People

nowdays

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nowadays

show examples

works

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work

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and

studies

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study

show examples

round the clock every day and

lost

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lose

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attention to their

health

. In these cases, they will cut their meals or

chose

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choose

show examples

to have fast food as their meals

such

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apply

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McDonald

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McDonald's

show examples

, KFC and Burger King, these foods serve in a shorter time but they are unhealthy

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apply

show examples

because

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they

show examples

are high

calories

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in calories

show examples

and oily food. In the course of time, they consume a lot of

harzadous

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hazardous

to their

health

and insufficient

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apply

show examples

nutrient

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nutrients

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, it may cause stroke, heart attack and obesity.

According to

Forbes, only 28% of Americans are meeting physical

acticity

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activity

guidelines,

that

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which

show examples

means more than 70% of

people

were

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apply

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lack of doing exercise. On

contrary

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the contrary

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, the

action

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actions

show examples

that can be taken by governments are limited, but they still have some

approach

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approaches

show examples

that can be carried out. Government can promote awareness to

public

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the public

show examples

to let them know the importance of

keeping

Verb problem

maintaining

show examples

health

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the health

show examples

of our body.

Besides

, related

department

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departments

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can conduct some camps or

speechs

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speech

speeches

at schools or communities.

Therefore

public

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the public

show examples

can learn more about

food

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the food

show examples

pyramid,

percentage

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the percentage

show examples

of nutrition that they should consume and the amount of exercise they should be done in a day.

However

government

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the government

show examples

can only

giving

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give

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advise

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advice

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and

encouraging

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encourage

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their

people

, it still

depending

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depends

show examples

on themselves. Taking everything into a nutshell, prevention is better than cure,

body

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the body

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is belongs

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belongs

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to us, we cannot expect others to help us keep fit,

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and we

show examples

need to take action before we suffer from any

diseases

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disease

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or illness.

At the end

of the day, we are the only

one

Correct pronoun usage

ones

show examples

who can take

responsibilites

Correct your spelling

responsibility

responsibilities

Change preposition

for

show examples

our

health

Submitted by sientan04 on Mon Jan 15 2024

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task achievement

Present clear positions throughout the response, ensuring that opinions or suggested solutions are relevant to the question asked. Consider both views equally before providing a balanced conclusion.

coherence cohesion

Use a range of cohesive devices and paragraphing accurately and appropriately. Establish clear relationships between sentences and paragraphs. Ensure a smooth flow and progression of ideas through logical sequencing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
45Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

334 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people argue that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their health and diet, while others believe that governments should be responsible for it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Today, more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara Desert or the Antartic. What are benefits or disadvantages for tourists visiting such places?

Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local language. If these are not taught many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and, if so, how?