Computers are being used more and more in education. Discuss the advantages and disadvantags.

Education is dependent on computers more than ever now and has become a usual part of studying. using computers in education has risen
as a result
it has some benefits but
on the other hand
, it can lead to some unpleasant things which will be discussed.
firstly
, these days digital equipment is largely used in schools and it is impossible to study without it.the amount of benefits that it has for us
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
plenty .
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
need to buy school books is lessened because they can download PDFs and study on different devices and do not have to carry many heavy books with them.
moreover
, there are subjects that can not be learned without a computer.
for instance
, programming-related studies.
Secondly
Add a comma
Secondly,
show examples
they made studying much easier for students.
on the other hand
, working a lot with digital devices has several downsides
.
Correct your spelling
For
for example
it can make the eyes dry and a few medical problems that are related to sight and more physical problems that came from sitting for a long time to work with them.
in addition
, extremely relying on computers might cause problems if they burn out or even get viruses because all the information and documents might disappear and we cannot have any access to them anymore.
To sum up
, even though the damages that it causes cannot be ignored the profits of using digital equipment easily surpass the disadvantages, and can hugely raise the quality of our studies
as a result
we need them more than ever in our life than before .
Submitted by behnazahmadi2004 on

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structure
Your essay lacks clear, distinct introduction and conclusion paragraphs, which are essential for a well-structured IELTS essay. Ensure that your essay opens with a clear introduction stating the topic and your thesis and ends with a conclusion summarizing your main points and restating your thesis.
logic
While you have attempted to structure your essay into paragraphs, the logical flow between ideas could be improved. Each paragraph should clearly address either an advantage or a disadvantage and be linked with appropriate transitional phrases for better readability.
examples
Provide more specific examples to support your arguments. Examples are a powerful tool in illustrating your points and demonstrating a deeper understanding of the topic. Make sure that each main idea has at least one clear, specific example.
task response
To fully address the task, ensure that you expand on both the advantages and disadvantages equally and provide a clear personal opinion or overall statement stipulating which side outweighs the other.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • e-learning
  • digital literacy
  • online collaboration
  • multimedia resources
  • virtual classrooms
  • cybersecurity
  • pedagogy
  • remote learning
  • adaptive technology
  • educational inequality
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