Computers are being used more and more in education. Discuss the advantages and disadvantags.

#computers #education #disadvantags

Education is dependent on computers more than ever now and has become a usual part of studying. using computers in education has risen

as a result

it has some benefits but

on the other hand

, it can lead to some unpleasant things which will be discussed.

firstly

, these days digital equipment is largely used in schools and it is impossible to study without it.the amount of benefits that it has for us

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

plenty .

For

example

Add a comma

example,

show examples

need to buy school books is lessened because they can download PDFs and study on different devices and do not have to carry many heavy books with them.

moreover

, there are subjects that can not be learned without a computer.

for instance

, programming-related studies.

Secondly

Add a comma

Secondly,

show examples

they made studying much easier for students.

on the other hand

, working a lot with digital devices has several downsides

Correct your spelling

For

for example

it can make the eyes dry and a few medical problems that are related to sight and more physical problems that came from sitting for a long time to work with them.

in addition

, extremely relying on computers might cause problems if they burn out or even get viruses because all the information and documents might disappear and we cannot have any access to them anymore.

To sum up

, even though the damages that it causes cannot be ignored the profits of using digital equipment easily surpass the disadvantages, and can hugely raise the quality of our studies

as a result

we need them more than ever in our life than before .

Submitted by behnazahmadi2004 on Tue Jan 16 2024

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structure

Your essay lacks clear, distinct introduction and conclusion paragraphs, which are essential for a well-structured IELTS essay. Ensure that your essay opens with a clear introduction stating the topic and your thesis and ends with a conclusion summarizing your main points and restating your thesis.

logic

While you have attempted to structure your essay into paragraphs, the logical flow between ideas could be improved. Each paragraph should clearly address either an advantage or a disadvantage and be linked with appropriate transitional phrases for better readability.

examples

Provide more specific examples to support your arguments. Examples are a powerful tool in illustrating your points and demonstrating a deeper understanding of the topic. Make sure that each main idea has at least one clear, specific example.

task response

To fully address the task, ensure that you expand on both the advantages and disadvantages equally and provide a clear personal opinion or overall statement stipulating which side outweighs the other.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

256 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

e-learning
digital literacy
online collaboration
multimedia resources
virtual classrooms
cybersecurity
pedagogy
remote learning
adaptive technology
educational inequality

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Computers are being used more and more in education. Discuss the advantages and disadvantags.

Your opinion

Nowadays, many people have easy access to computers and a large number of children play computer games.What are the negative impact of playing computer games? What can be done to minimise these effects?

Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

A growing number of people feel that animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans must employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including use for food and research.