IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

A friend of yours is going on holiday soon and has asked you to recommend a destination. Write a letter to your friend and recommend a good place for a holiday that you have visited before.Say where you went, where you stayed, what you can do there and what the food was like.

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Hey joe, I hope you are doing well. I got your mail that you are planning a holiday soon, I would recommend you to go
New
Change preposition
to New

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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York
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 as I went there
last
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 summer with my parents. As you are living in Montreal, New
York
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 is just 6
hours
Correct your spelling
6-hour

If you don’t want hours to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

drive from there. You should go
my
Correct your spelling
by

The word my doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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 car, as it will be convenient for you to travel between your hotel and
subway
Correct article usage
the subway

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 station. You should book your hotel in New Jersey; it will be much cheaper
instead
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 of booking
expensive
Add an article
an expensive

The noun phrase expensive hotel seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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 hotel in New
York
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. Once reaching New
York
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, you should only travel by subway as there will be a lot of traffic in
NYC
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, which will kill
your
Correct pronoun usage
you

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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 most of the time. You should visit
Statue
Correct article usage
the Statue

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 of Liberty and
Time
Correct your spelling
Times

The word Time doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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 Square without a second thought, these are the main tourist attractions in
NYC
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 and they are so elegant. In
NYC
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 you will have
lot
Change the article
a lot

It appears that the phrase lot does not contain the correct article usage. Consider making a change.

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 of options for eating. I would suggest you
to
Remove the particle
apply

The verb eat appears to be in the subjunctive mood. Consider removing the particle to.

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eat the Dollar pizza. You will find those on every other street in
NYC
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, and
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, they are very good in taste. I
wish
Verb problem
hope

There may be a verb use issue here.

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 you
may
Verb problem
apply

There may be a verb use issue here.

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have the best trip and don’t hesitate to call me if you have any questions. Best Regards, Dhruvil

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the letter follows a clear logical structure, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct topic, such as the recommendation of the destination, accommodation advice, travel tips, and food suggestions.
coherence cohesion
Use appropriate greetings and closings for a semi-formal letter, avoiding overly casual language such as 'Hey' and opting for a more appropriate closing instead of 'Best Regards', to match the context of the task.
task achievement
Include more specific experiences and descriptive details about the destination to enhance the task response. Mention particular places to stay, activities to enjoy, and types of food to try, as well as why you recommend them based on your personal experience.
task achievement
Adopt a semi-formal tone throughout the letter, suitable for writing to a friend while still maintaining a certain level of formality to address the task appropriately.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • picturesque
  • breathtaking
  • culturally rich
  • accommodations
  • amenities
  • local cuisine
  • adventure sports
  • historical sites
  • memorable experience
  • quaint
  • authentic
  • scenic views
  • hospitality
  • serenity
  • bustling markets
  • authentic dining experience
  • pristine
  • local delicacies
  • vibrant
  • tranquil
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