The rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole

#rise #media #relationships #society

The rise of social

media

has had a profound impact on personal relationships and society as a whole,

while

there are certainly advantages to using social

media

for communication.

This

author believes that the benefits of

keep

Change the verb form

keeping

show examples

in contact with people all around the world and entertainment surpass outweigh the drawbacks of feeling anxiety and depression. The most advantageous factor of

stay

Wrong verb form

staying

show examples

connected is that social

media

has made it easier than ever to keep in touch with friends and family members, even if they live far away.

In other words

, people can stay at home to talk and chat with friends through the small screen anytime

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

you

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

want maybe all day.

However

, it saves a lot of time-consuming to go out to meet them. From prior knowledge, using social

media

platforms like Facebook, Instagram and Twitter

permit

Correct subject-verb agreement

permits

show examples

us to share our lives with others, and to keep up with what’s happening in the lives of those we care about.

In addition

, using social

media

can

also

be used to build communities around shared interests.

For example

, you can join groups or fan pages where you can connect with others who share your passions and interests.

In other words

Thus

, social

media

can

also

be a powerful tool for organizing events, raising awareness about important issues, and building communities around shared interests. Another negative aspect of spending

social

Change preposition

on social

show examples

media

is feeling depression, anxiety and loneliness. Social

media

can

also

be a breeding ground for misinformation

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and can be used to spread hate speech and other harmful content.

Additionally

, social

media

can be a major source of distraction

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and can make it difficult to focus on important tasks. Usually, cyberbullying in social

media

is an action popular

Change preposition

apply

show examples

today.

For instance

, when you became famous

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

known by many people but after

that

Add a comma

that,

show examples

in the

past

Add a comma

past,

show examples

you were school behavior with the innocents, citizens will rummage bad information from you to the latest

new

Correct your spelling

news

show examples

This

will make your image

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

tarnished leading to feel do not want to live in the world. Since screens hide our faces, you can end up being a jerk on social

media

and other websites without even realizing it. Taking all points into account, the possible impact of consuming social

media

being conventional is outweighed.

Moreover

, I would suggest that social

media

is a useful tool and adds value to our lives.

Submitted by [email protected] on Tue Jan 16 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present

Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are clear and effective in summarizing the main points and establishing a position.

logical structure

Work on creating a more logical structure by grouping related ideas together and using cohesive devices appropriately to signal relationships between ideas.

supported main points

Develop main points with more specific examples and details to strengthen the argument and provide clarity.

complete response

The essay should comprehensively respond to all parts of the task, presenting a balanced view and addressing both the benefits and drawbacks of social media with equal consideration.

clear comprehensive ideas

Aim to present ideas more clearly and comprehensively, avoiding generalizations and ensuring that each paragraph conveys a single clear idea.

relevant specific examples

Include more relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points and to give your argument more weight.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

397 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Digital communication
Online presence
Privacy concerns
Cyberbullying
Social networking sites
Virtual communities
Echo chambers
Digital footprint
Social media influencers
Content dissemination
User-generated content
Interpersonal relationships
Cognitive dissonance

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Some argue that toddlers below 12 years of age should not own smartphones, while others suggest it is an essential medium for all adolescents. Although preventing them from using mobile phones can curb the addiction, I believe restricting it would only halt a child's learning potential.
5
band
Some people believe that money spent on space exploration is not justifiable. There are more beneficial ways to spend this money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, governments and billionaires across the world allocated considerable amount of their resources to reach for the stars, aiming to shed some lights on the mystery surroundoing the space above us. However, I consider myself as an opposition to those space exploration missions as the resource can be allocated to resolve a more grounded, yet relevant problem for our civilization.
6.5
band
Some people think most crimes are the result of circumstances like poverty and other social problems. Others believe that they are caused by people who are bad in nature. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In this contemporary epoch of rising crimes in society, a significant number of individuals contend that poverty, lack of health, or education amenities are the major causes. Critics say that it is the result of the poor nature of some people. In my perspective, I ardently support the first assertion. This essay will delve into the reasons behind both views and will lead to a logical conclusion as well.
7.5
band
Plastic products are bad for environment? Tell me the cause and solution?
Plastic items can be detrimental to the environment. This essay discusses some of the reasons why and provides practical solutions to address this problem.The core issue with many plastic products lies in their non-recyclable or difficult-to-recycle nature. Rather than fully decomposing, these items often break down into tiny microplastic particles. This causes significant risks to ecosystems and human well-being, as microplastics have been increasingly linked to emerging health concerns. Furthermore, these microscopic organisms can actually play a role in generating significant quantities of greenhouse gases, which then go on to influence weather patterns and climate conditions. For instance, the increased production of these heat-trapping gases by certain microbes can contribute to rising temperatures that many regions have been grappling with. One of the biggest solutions to reducing plastic pollution is improving waste management infrastructure and recycling capabilities, especi...
5
band
Some people are born to be a leadership others believe that leadership can be learned. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Every people born with the ability that accompanies them to survive in this life. So many skills could be developed such as interpersonal skills, negotiation skills, and important one is leadership skills. Basically, as a leader, we must realize that we have an undirectly responsibility to led our people to become good people. Hence, if there is any person who has faith as a leader it means they have a potential personality that is suit for a leader's criteria.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

The rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole

Include an introduction and conclusion

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that money spent on space exploration is not justifiable. There are more beneficial ways to spend this money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think most crimes are the result of circumstances like poverty and other social problems. Others believe that they are caused by people who are bad in nature. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Plastic products are bad for environment? Tell me the cause and solution?

Some people are born to be a leadership others believe that leadership can be learned. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+