In some countries today, people are having their first child when they are older. What are the reasons for this? Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#countries #people #first #child #development

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In the modern world, humans are expected to have their first offspring later, when they are aged. Many people indicate that it is because

Remove the comma

apply

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they want to be completely sure that their son or daughter is financially strong others comment that it is because of their career.

This

essay will highlight the advantages of

this

approach which surpass the disadvantages brought by it. To embark on, one of the paramount factors behind

this

is parents are thinking about their finances. Every caretaker wants their newborn should

take

Verb problem

get

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an education from

high standard

Add a hyphen

high-standard

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schools for

this

they should be financially strong because nowadays fee structure are reaching their all-time high.

For instance

, in the

last

five years, Gyan Ganga International School raised their fees up to 100% and now for many parents, it is not affordable to give their pupils an education in the same school. Probing ahead, some adults prefer having a good career and enjoying social life to sitting at home and raising their offspring. On the other words, few parents don’t want to sacrifice their personal young life.

Hence

, proper planning is necessary before giving birth to a new baby. There are a plethora of cons of view,

firstly

delaying pregnancy can lead to health complications. Fertility starts to decline after the age of thirty, and babies born

after

this

age might have a higher risk of health conditions

for instance

Dawn syndrome and other genetic birth defects.

Hence

, having a kid in old maturity can have fatal consequences for an infant's well-being.

Secondly

, having a child later may cause a significant gap between two generations.

For example

, Doctors always give advice not

Replace the word

too

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late for planning because by 45, fertility has declined so much that getting pregnant naturally is unlikely.

To conclude

, some benefits can be visible in having a kid in old age

such

that their children will be financially secure,

nevertheless

offsprings

Fix the agreement mistake

offspring

show examples

can have serious issues with health.

Submitted by shubhashish.bobby on Tue Jan 16 2024

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coherence cohesion

The essay structure is fairly clear, with an introduction, body, and conclusion. However, some paragraphs could be more logically developed to further enhance clarity. It is advisable to ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within the paragraph coherently contribute to that idea.

task achievement

The essay addresses the prompt, but could improve by developing a more detailed discussion with a better balance of ideas regarding advantages and disadvantages. Expand on the arguments with more in-depth explanation and consider equal treatment of both the advantages and disadvantages for a more comprehensive response.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

323 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Shift
Trend
Societal norms
Education and career
Financial stability
Reproductive technologies
Delayed marriages
Parenting responsibilities
Life expectancy
Family planning

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In some countries today, people are having their first child when they are older. What are the reasons for this? Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Include an introduction and conclusion

These days, too many people maintain their health by relying on doctors and medicine, rather than by following a healthy lifestyle.

In the future, all cars, buses and trucks will be driveless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you thik the advantages of driveless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Most artists earn low salaries and should therefore receive funds from the government in order for them to continue with their work. To what extent do you agree? Outline

Some people believe that university education is essential if people have a successful life, while others think that nowadays this is not true. Discuss both points of view and give your own opinion.