Some people choose a career, according to the social status and salary it will give them. Others choose a career, according to whether they will enjoy the work. Which do you think is the best way to choose a career? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Deciding a profession is an important milestone in our life. It is
evedent
that a part of people Correct your spelling
evident
select
their Change the verb form
selects
job
according to
the social status and remunaration
from that meanwhile other Correct your spelling
remuneration
part
of Change the wording
parts
indivudulas
choose the Correct your spelling
individuals
profesion
in which they enjoy and Correct your spelling
profession
satisfactio
. I think both these play Correct your spelling
satisfaction
a
Correct article usage
apply
crucila
roles in choosing a career. Correct your spelling
crucial
However
, I personally believe that selecting a work
according to
our enjoyment would be the best way.
Firstly
, Picking a job
through
considering salaries and other financial benefits Change preposition
by
sometime
Replace the word
sometimes
lead
us towards a wealthy life where we have all Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
physical
facilities to live a quality life. What Correct article usage
the physical
i
mean by Change the capitalization
I
this
that
money is essential to meet our daily needs and wants as we wish. And Add a missing verb
is that
thus
, it may be a factor which can influence a person deciding his vocation. For example
, in Sri Lanka, many poor pupils spend a lot of money for
their studies Change preposition
on
as
a result 90 per cent of those students probably look after the Correct word choice
and as
monetory
gain from a Correct your spelling
monetary
job
.
On other
hand, determining an occupation in which a person has Correct article usage
the other
interest
gives him immense happiness and satisfaction. Correct article usage
an interest
This
is to say, Everyone
has their own dreams to be in their future and Correct your spelling
that everyone
also
they work
hard for
achieve Change preposition
to
that
. So, it is important that thinking about Correct pronoun usage
them
the
enjoyment and peacefulness when selecting a Correct article usage
apply
work
is crucial. nowadays, moreover
, many youngsters decide their
Change preposition
on their
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
according to
their intersest
Correct your spelling
interest
interests
such
as youtubers
and journalists.
Correct your spelling
YouTubers
To conclude
, monetory
rewards and Correct your spelling
monetary
work
enjoyment are the main determinant
of an Change the noun form
determinants
individuals's
employment and people always love to choose their Remove the s
individuals'
job
as per their passion but financial circumstances sometimes make them to
go behind the career which Change the verb form
apply
provide
them Change the verb form
provides
lot
of money.Change the article
a lot
Submitted by ajeevatharsan on
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coherence cohesion
It's important to process and organize your thoughts clearly. The essay should have a logical flow from introduction to conclusion, with clear paragraphing. You should work on creating stronger topic sentences that guide the reader through your argument.
coherence cohesion
A range of linking words is required, but the overuse or mechanical use can lower your score. Aim for fluent and natural use of language. Pay attention to spelling errors, including incorrect use of plurals ('indivudulas', 'profesion', 'monetory', 'pupils', 'intersest'), and misplaced letters ('evedent', 'remunaration', 'satisfactio', 'crucila', 'vocation'). These can significantly affect the reader's understanding and the overall coherence of your essay.
task achievement
You should fully address all parts of the task. Your essay must do more than simply state what you believe; you must also explain and support your views with evidence or examples. If you opt to discuss both viewpoints, they must be clearly and equally presented. Work on expanding and clearly supporting your main ideas. Avoid unsupported statements and ensure your examples are detailed and relevant to the point being made. Inconsistencies in spellings such as 'monetory gain' and colloquial expressions or informal language ('what I mean by this', 'as we wish') are not suitable for formal essay writing.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
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