IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The bar charts below provide information about percentages of students who are proficient in foreign language in different countries.

The bar charts below provide information about percentages of students who are proficient in foreign language in different countries.
#bar #information #percentages #students #language #countries
The chart shows data about percentages of students' fluency in foreign
language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
show examples
 in six different nations.
Overall
, the students either male
and
Correct word choice
or
show examples
 female from India can speak most in
abroad
Correct article usage
the abroad
show examples
language
, followed by Romanian, Vietnam, Russia, Thailand and China. The trends of each country
signifies
Change the verb form
signify
show examples
 that female speaks proficiently in foreign
language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
show examples
,
exclude
Wrong verb form
excluding
show examples
 Thailand. To specify these
learners
Change noun form
learners'
show examples
 gender, it is found that men in India are multi-lingual by recording roughly 55%, followed by
Romanian's
Change noun form
Romanian
show examples
language
enthusiast
Fix the agreement mistake
enthusiasts
show examples
 with slightly over 40%,
meanwhile
Add a comma
meanwhile,
show examples
 almost under 40% of male speakers
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
likes to engage outside their native languages come from Vietnam, Russia and Thailand
thus
 leaving China in
last
 position by recording less than 20%. In
girls'
Correct article usage
the girls'
show examples
 category, India leads the percentage
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 all countries participating with around 68%, slightly over
than
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Romania with
estimated
Correct article usage
an estimated
show examples
 65%, and third by Vietnam
around
Change preposition
at around
show examples
 58%. The other countries maintain their positions
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 42% to slightly under 30%.
Submitted by imsarunn on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words language with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: