Some people argue that social media platforms are essential for communication and staying connected, while others believe that they pose a threat to personal privacy. On which position do you stand? Discuss the supporting ideas for your chosen position.
In the era of advanced communication technology, the role of social
media
has become a subject of debate. Advocates argue that these platforms serve as indispensable tools for fostering connections and maintaining relationships. Social media
facilitates instant communication, allowing individuals to share life updates, engage in discussions, and bridge geographical gaps.
On the contrary
, critics raise concerns about the potential infringement on personal privacy posed by social media
platforms. They highlight instances of data breaches, unauthorized access to personal information, and the commodification of user data for targeted advertising. Privacy advocates caution that the convenience of social media
comes at the cost of compromising sensitive information.
Personally, I align with the perspective that emphasizes the positive aspects of social media
. The ability to connect with friends and family, share experiences, and engage in global conversations outweighs the privacy risks for me. The democratization of information and the sense of a global community fostered by social media
are valuable contributions to our interconnected world.Submitted by TUTOO on
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coherence cohesion
Consider structuring your essay in a more logically consistent manner, ensuring that each paragraph smoothly transitions to the next. This enhances readability and coherence.
coherence cohesion
While an introduction and conclusion are present, work on making your conclusion more robust and reflective of the overall argument presented. Your conclusion should effectively summarize your position and the main points discussed.
coherence cohesion
To support your main points, include more detailed examples and elaborate further on the ideas presented. Specificity adds depth to your arguments and aids in demonstrating a full understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Overall, you have addressed the topic and presented a response that aligns with one side of the argument. To further improve your task achievement score, ensure that your response is fully developed with a balance of personal perspective and general analysis. Providing a more complete response to the prompt will make your essay more convincing.
task achievement
The ideas presented are clear, but could be expanded upon for greater comprehensive coverage of the topic. Enhance your response by exploring the counterarguments in more depth and addressing potential rebuttals to your position.
task achievement
While relevant examples are mentioned, they lack specificity. Strengthen your argument by incorporating specific, real-world examples that directly support your claims. This will make your argument more persuasive and grounded.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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