Some people think that parents should limit the time their children spend watching TV and playing computer games and encourage them to read books instead. Do you agree or disagree?

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Recently, quite a lot of
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

are
Wrong verb form
have been

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb are. Consider changing it.

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keen on spending
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

on screen,
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as playing online games or watching TV. I am convinced that
these
Correct determiner usage
this

It seems that determiner use may be incorrect here.

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time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should be restricted by their parents, and more
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should be focused on
readings
Correct your spelling
reading

The word readings doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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instead
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

. One of
Correct article usage
the reason

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons

It seems that reason may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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regarding
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

viewpoint could be related to
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's
health
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. For physical
health
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

,
according to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

several scientific findings and people's common sense, spending
long
Correct article usage
a long

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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duration
in
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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electronic
Add an article
the electronic

The noun phrase electronic device seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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device
Fix the agreement mistake
devices

It seems that device may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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does harm to personal
health
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

its
Correct pronoun usage
their

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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physical nature and essence,
whatever
Correct word choice
whether

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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young adults or
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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aged people. Especially for the former, because they are growing with numerous organs and parts being immature, it is more likely to
be suffered
Wrong verb form
suffer

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb be suffered. Consider changing it.

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from endless exposure to screen
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
Besides
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, mental
health
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

cannot be ignored. It is obvious that some TV programmes are full of
horric
Correct your spelling
horrific

If you don’t want horric to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

, fake and
unhealth
Correct your spelling
unhealthy

The word unhealth doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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information, like violence, gambling and so forth.
Nevertheless
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

fail to distinguish what is positive and negative
beacuse
Correct your spelling
because

If you don’t want beacuse to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

of their immaturity
on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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mentality, and they tend to have the possibility to commit
crime
Add an article
a crime
the crime

The noun phrase crime seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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if they
emitate
Correct your spelling
imitate

If you don’t want emitate to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

negative information and put them into
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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reality.
In contrast
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, readings should be attached importance to every family since reading a majority of books can cultivate our
To conclude
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, parents' limitation of
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

on watching TV and playing online games would be
a
Change the article
an

The article a may be incorrect. Consider changing it to agree with the beginning sound of the following word appropriate.

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appropriate selection for
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's physical and psychological
health
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. Alternatively, doing some readings is of
benefits
Fix the agreement mistake
benefit

It seems that benefits may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
on
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.

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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, ensure that paragraphs are well-structured with clear topic sentences and supporting details that logically flow from one idea to the next. Use a variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas within and across paragraphs.
task achievement
For task achievement, extend and fully develop your main points with relevant examples and explanations. Address all parts of the prompt thoroughly, ensuring that your opinion is clear and consistent throughout the essay.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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