Many parents choose to teach their children at home instead of sending them to school. Do you think the benefits of homeschooling outweigh its drawbacks?

A lot of
parents
now
has
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have
show examples
gone for homeschooling rather than sending them to traditional schools , In my opinion benefit of homeschooling is
out wight
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outweigh
show examples
the
draw back
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drawback
show examples
as
if
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it
show examples
offer
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offers
show examples
personalized learning for
student
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students
show examples
as well as
individual attention .
Home schooling
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Homeschooling
show examples
can provide personalized learning for
student
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students
show examples
that can add more help , Personalized learning means having
tailored
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a tailored
show examples
curriculum for every
student
according to
their preferred style and interest ,
means
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which means
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become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
flexible which
lead
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leads
show examples
to effective and enjoyable learning for
student
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students
show examples
who struggle at school
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
if the
student
is
visual
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a visual
show examples
learner his
parents
could add more visual aids and
hands on
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hands-on
show examples
activity
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activities
show examples
to their lessons . Another advantage of homeschooling is individual attention Buy
parents
have
Add a hyphen
one-to-one
show examples
one-to one
Add a hyphen
one-to-one
show examples
daily instruction and guiding them when
study
Wrong verb form
studying
show examples
this
helps the
parents
to spot their
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
weaknesses and strengths so they can provide more support
at
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in
show examples
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
subjects
For instance
if the
student
having
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apply
show examples
a
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apply
show examples
difficulties
Change preposition
with
show examples
on
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with
show examples
one subject the
parents
could dedicate more time
an
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and
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sources
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resources
show examples
Change preposition
to
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for
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to
show examples
this
subject . Homeschooling advantages outweigh the
disadvantage
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disadvantages
show examples
as
parents
could have personalized learning
plan
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plans
show examples
as well as
individual attention for
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
during the
lesons
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lessons
lesson
.
Submitted by hebadyala on

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introduction
Consider starting with a more engaging introduction that clearly presents your position on the topic and includes a clear thesis statement outlining the main points you will discuss.
paragraph structure
To achieve a higher score in coherence and cohesion, it's essential to organize your essay into clear paragraphs. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea presented in a topic sentence, followed by supporting sentences, and a concluding sentence where appropriate.
linking words
Use a wider range of linking phrases and discourse markers to improve the flow of the essay and to make the relationships between ideas clearer. Currently, the essay does not make use of these cohesively.
examples
When giving examples, ensure they are relevant and well-explained. Expanding on the examples with more details can make your argument stronger.
balanced response
For task achievement, attempt to present a more balanced argument when the question asks for a discussion of both benefits and drawbacks. Addressing both sides of the issue can lead to a more complete response.
grammar and spelling
Double-check your work for spelling, grammatical accuracy, and punctuation. Errors in these areas can significantly impact the readability of the essay.
conclusion
Make sure to have a conclusion that reiterates your main points and clearly states your final standpoint on the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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