Some people think that Olympic games are exciting events that bring other nations together. Others say Olympic is a waste of money and the money could be better spent on other things. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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The Olympic
Games
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have long been a subject of debate, with some viewing them as thrilling events that unite nations,
while
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others consider them a waste of resources that could be better allocated
elsewhere
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. Both perspectives have merit and warrant a closer examination. Proponents of the
Olympics
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argue that these
games
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are more than just athletic competitions; they are global events that foster international unity and cultural exchange. The
Olympics
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provide a platform for athletes from diverse backgrounds to showcase their talents, promoting a spirit of camaraderie and sportsmanship.
For instance
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, the
Olympics
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encourage countries to put aside their differences and come together in the name of friendly competition.
Additionally
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, the
games
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can inspire young people to engage in sports and pursue athletic excellence, fostering a healthier society. The international exposure
also
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boosts tourism and global recognition for the host country, potentially leading to long-term economic
benefits
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.
On the other hand
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, critics argue that the enormous financial burden of hosting the
Olympics
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often outweighs the
benefits
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. The cost of building infrastructure,
such
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as stadiums, transportation networks, and accommodations, can run into billions of dollars.
For example
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, the 2016 Rio de Janeiro
Olympics
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faced significant criticism for the extensive public spending amidst Brazil's economic struggles. Critics suggest that these funds could be better spent on essential public services like healthcare, education, and social welfare, which have a more immediate and lasting impact on the well-being of the population.
Moreover
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, the infrastructure built for the
Olympics
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often falls into disuse after the event, leading to wasted resources and ongoing maintenance costs. In my opinion,
while
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the
Olympics
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have undeniable
benefits
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in terms of promoting international unity and sportsmanship, the financial implications cannot be overlooked. To balance both views, it is crucial for the International Olympic Committee and host nations to implement more sustainable practices.
This
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could include using existing facilities, investing in multipurpose venues that benefit the community long after the
games
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are over, and ensuring transparency in spending. In conclusion, the Olympic
Games
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have the potential to bring nations together and inspire individuals globally.
However
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, the financial burden they impose must be carefully managed to ensure that the
benefits
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outweigh the costs. By adopting more sustainable and fiscally responsible practices, the
Olympics
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can continue to be a celebrated global event without compromising essential public services.
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task achievement
Your task response is excellent. You provided a balanced discussion of both viewpoints and stated your own opinion clearly. This effectively covers all parts of the prompt.
task achievement
While your ideas are clear and comprehensive, adding a few more specific statistics or real-life examples could strengthen your arguments and make them more compelling.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear and logical structure, which is crucial for coherence and cohesion. Each paragraph flows smoothly to the next, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument.
coherence cohesion
To further improve, ensure each point is explicitly supported with evidence or examples. For instance, more details on how the Olympics promote international unity or specifics on post-event infrastructural uses would be beneficial.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are very effective in framing the discussion and summarizing your viewpoint. This provides a strong sense of closure for the reader.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are well-supported and logically structured, demonstrating a strong command of essay organization.
task achievement
You provide a balanced and nuanced discussion, which is essential for a high task achievement score. The essay clearly addresses both sides of the argument and offers a thoughtful opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • foster global unity
  • international camaraderie
  • cultural exchange
  • mutual understanding
  • platform for showcasing
  • national pride
  • human achievement
  • economic benefits
  • influx of tourism
  • boost local economies
  • infrastructure investments
  • long-term benefits
  • enormous costs
  • pressing social issues
  • white elephants
  • poor return on investment
  • environmental impact
  • short-lived event
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