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Band 4

University education should be free to everyone, regardless of income. To what extent do you agree?

#university #education #income
Higher
education
 offers prestigious degrees that would increase
chances
Correct article usage
the chances
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 of obtaining better compensation. It affords one to
getting
Wrong verb form
get
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 promoted easily or
securing
Wrong verb form
secure
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 a job with great salaries and benefits and
its
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it's
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also
 a great testament
of
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to
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 one's competence.
Due to
this
, proponents state that it should be free and accessible to all regardless of one's economic status. In my view, I disagree with it being free
due to
 a number of reasons. Tertiary
education
 is a prestige that needs to be earned. Courses in these
level
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levels
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 are highly technical and
requires
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require
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 competent professional teachers to dedicate time and effort to review and teach their material to the enrollees of these subjects. Fees for higher
education
reduces
Correct subject-verb agreement
reduce
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 the field to be completely saturated
thus
 giving value and relevance to the field. The fees will filter out those who are willing to sacrifice time, money, and effort to finish the course.
For instance
, doctorate courses will only allow students who worked those who burned.
Due to
 the economic benefits it brings to the graduates of
this
 degree, it permits a limited number of people to be able to access
this
 degree. Higher
education
 is not a right that needs to be given to everyone
hence
 it should maintain its exclusivity by imposing relevant fees.
This
 exclusivity is only catered to those who are willing to go through a different level of sacrifice.
Submitted by lwvnyn on

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task achievement
Work on providing a more balanced argument when discussing the essay's topic. It's important to confront both sides of the issue to show a comprehensive understanding.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure there is a clear introduction and conclusion that encapsulate the essay's main points and personal stance.
task achievement
Support your main points with more detailed and specific examples. These should be directly relevant to the issue being discussed.
coherence and cohesion
Organize ideas more logically and clearly within paragraphs, ensuring each paragraph has a central idea and a logical flow that is easy to follow by the reader.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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