The tv and the internet provide opportunity to ordinary people to become famous.Is this a positive or a negative development?

#tv #internet #opportunity #people #development

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The development of technology allows

people

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can access the internet and digital TV easily. It is argued that nowadays

people

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from ordinary backgrounds can be actors or actresses too.

This

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condition

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can have a negative impact on the young generation because there is a possibility they will leave school rather than take higher education to become

influencers

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However

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this

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condition

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can

also

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motivate the young generation to be agents of change by working in the creative industry. There are many young

influencers

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who do not have high education who become famous in

this

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era. The reasons why they can be famous are not because of their achievement but because they are funny and can entertain

people

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Furthermore

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, those

influencers

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that come from ordinary

people

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become rich instantly. Somehow,

this

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condition

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can give a negative motivation to other young generation, especially

people

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who want to be rich instantly.

For example

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, in Indonesia, many young

people

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decided to leave school to focus on their careers as content creators on social media platforms

such

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as Instagram and TikTok.

In addition

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, at the same time, the ease of becoming famous

people

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can

also

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motivate young

people

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, especially those who have a great achievement appear on social media to share their experiences when achieving success. In fact, these types of

influencers

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have a huge impact on other young

people

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who have the same dream.

For instance

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, there are many

influencers

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from Indonesia that motivate other

people

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to continue their master's degrees abroad. They always share their tips and tricks to become international students in top universities in the world. In conclusion, the ease of becoming famous has a negative and positive impact on society.

This

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condition

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can influence young

people

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to become bad

influencers

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and

also

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can motivate them to be good

influencers

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Submitted by zahra.ghaisanis on Sat Jan 20 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

For better Coherence and Cohesion, focus on creating a more logical structure that guides the reader through the essay. Make sure each paragraph has a clear central idea, and the overall essay should have a clear progression from introduction to conclusion. It's also important to use transition words and phrases between sentences and paragraphs to improve the flow of ideas and strengthen the cohesion within the essay. Lastly, ensure that the introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay, with the conclusion providing a complete resolution to the points discussed.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

298 words

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The tv and the internet provide opportunity to ordinary people to become famous.Is this a positive or a negative development?

Your opinion

you are living in a university residence , and you have a problem with the high levels of noise from a new campus retaurant which opens until might . Write letter to governor describing problem : complain about the situation say why this is problem and propose ways to reduce the noise

In many countries, young adults are engaged in some kinds of work. Some people regard this as completely wrong. Others consider it as a valuable experience, important for learning and taking responsibilities. Discuss both views

Space exploration is very expensive and the money should spend on other thing. Agree or not?

sudents should pay full cost for their own study, because university education beniefits individuals rather than society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

These days, many people have their own computer and telephone, so it is quite easy for them to do their job at home. Do advantages of working at home outweigh diadvantages?