Some people consider computers to be more of a hindrance than a help. Others believe that they have greatly increased human potentials. What is your opinion?
It is often held that
technology
accessibility have
a significant influence on Change the verb form
has
people
. While
people
argue that these factors are contributing on
Change preposition
to
indiscretion
usage of Correct article usage
the indiscretion
technology
in shaping human’s future. This
essay disagrees that an increase in technology
is not beneficial to the
mankind.
The development of Correct article usage
apply
technology
itself has increasing
Wrong verb form
increased
easiest
access for Correct article usage
the easiest
people
and help
them to ease chores in daily life. Wrong verb form
helped
Morover
, Correct your spelling
Moreover
people
can search and learn about something they don’t know through searching
Replace the word
search
engine
. It is Fix the agreement mistake
engines
therefore
agreed that technology
is a very worthwhile tool for everyone. Computer is a prime example, while
Correct word choice
apply
people
can use it to enhance human potential: Correct word choice
and boosted
boosted
productivity, creativity, and innovation in various fields.
Wrong verb form
boost
However
, many agree and feel that technology
deprives people
of real human interaction. Human interaction teaches people
valuable skills such
as discourse and empathy. For instance
, you still can interact with people
through social media like Zoom, Skype, or Facebook. On the other hand
, this
will allow you to gain global communication without limited access. You
able to connect with cross-cultural collaboration and expand potential networking. Despite that, it is still possible to achieve that if Add a verb
You are
You were
human
can Fix the agreement mistake
humans
acts
wise and decline the dependency on Change the verb form
act
technology
.
In conclusion,while
the benefits of technology
, particularly computer
, allow human Fix the agreement mistake
computers
being
to own accessible tool which leads Fix the agreement mistake
beings
more
limitless information all over the world, some still feel that it might be a threat and now allow Change preposition
to more
people
to curb face-to-face interaction. However
, as long as we carefully consider the importance Change preposition
of task
task
in our Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
life
and be wise in the usage of Fix the agreement mistake
lives
technology
, overall
it is clearly positive.Submitted by sofinnovita on
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Introduction and Conclusion
Your introduction sets out your viewpoint but it lacks a clear thesis statement outlining the essay structure. It's important to explicitly present the essay's main arguments to guide the reader.
Logical Structure
Aim to use a wider range of linking words and cohesive devices to improve the essay's flow. Ensure that paragraphs are well-structured and ideas seamlessly connect to one another.
Supported Main Points
Your main points are broadly supported, but you'll benefit from providing more concrete examples and evidence to back up your claims. Avoid general statements; specificity strengthens an argument.
Complete Response
Make sure to directly address the essay prompt and cover all aspects of the task. The response feels incomplete and tangential at points, deviating from the central topic.
Clear Comprehensive Ideas
Sharpen and elaborate on your ideas to fully explore the issues raised. Utilize complex sentences and a clearer progression of thoughts to enhance your argument.
Relevant Specific Examples
Incorporate specific, real-world examples to illustrate your points. Anecdotes, statistics, or historical references can make your argument more persuasive and grounded.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?