Some people say computers have made life more difficult and complicated, others think that it has made our lives easier. Do you agree or disagree? Give specific reasons and examples to support your view.
Whether the use of computers helps to ease the lifestyle or it
create
negative effects is a topic of concern. Change the verb form
creates
However
, I concur with the phenomenon that it has many benefits to
Change preposition
for
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
like every work
from Wrong verb form
working
home
and reliable source of information . In the upcoming paragraphs, I will elaborate on these.
Computers are a man- made
Add a hyphen
man-made
device
. It has Fix the agreement mistake
devices
remove
many dilemmas from Change the verb form
removed
citizens
Change noun form
citizens'
citizen's
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
such
as by sitting at home
people
can access it. Nation can pay their phone and electricity bills. They can shop from all over the world. Employees can attend meetings. Moreover
, families can talk with their lovable. For example
, a study showed that a higher percentage of people
said laptops aid to manage
their work and Change preposition
in managing
home
life
in this
modern era. They do not need to worry for
their Change preposition
about
home
chores any more beccause
it Correct your spelling
because
remove
the issues of long queues. Change the verb form
removes
Thus
, people
can get time for their personal life
before that
they were wasting it for many works.
Correct word choice
apply
Additionally
, it is a reliable source of information. It has news from all surrounding on every topic. With the help of a click
Add a comma
click,
people
can know all matters. Citizens do not need to study a newspaper for long
time to know what is going on. Change the article
a long
Moreover
, popularity
of TV news Add an article
the popularity
are
Change the verb form
is
also
declining owing to the availability of sources of
Change preposition
on
Correct article usage
the internet
internet
. Capitalize word
Internet
For instance
, in order to search for a
history Correct article usage
apply
people
went to libraries, collect
Wrong verb form
collected
the
pieces of Correct article usage
apply
papers
and read all the newspapers from Fix the agreement mistake
paper
back dates
. Eventually, they were wasting their time. Correct your spelling
backdates
Hence
, due to
this
media
they can read Add a comma
media,
any thing
from Correct your spelling
anything
past
and present.
In conclusion, Correct article usage
the past
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
is
vital in the Correct subject-verb agreement
are
life
of Fix the agreement mistake
lives
residences
. Replace the word
residents
Youngs
and Correct your spelling
Young
olds
can access it under one roof for daily Correct your spelling
old
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
also
it provide
us Change the verb form
provides
true
information from Change preposition
with true
globe
. After an analysis, Add an article
the globe
it is clear that
without computers life
is nothing.Submitted by kb781920 on
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coherence cohesion
Make sure your essay has a clear introduction, body and conclusion. The introduction should set the stage for the discussion, and the conclusion should summarize the main points effectively. It is evident you have structured your essay in this format. However, you should focus on creating stronger topic sentences that clearly state the main idea of each paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Use a range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas and paragraphs, which will help the reader follow your argument more easily. While some connectives are present, additional and varied cohesive devices could enhance the logical flow of your essay.
task achievement
Support main points with specific reasons and examples. The instances you provided are on the right track, but they need to be more detailed and concrete to convincingly back up your claims.
task achievement
Ensure that your response fully addresses all parts of the task. Although you have attempted to answer the question, it would help to provide a more balanced view by exploring both sides of the argument, as this will demonstrate a full understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Develop your ideas fully to show comprehensive coverage of the topic. You have touched upon several key ideas, but expanding on these will show a deeper level of understanding and analysis. It is also important to check for grammatical accuracy and range of vocabulary to increase the clarity and diversity of your language.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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