The table give information about salaries of secondary/high school teachers in fivr countries in 2009.

The table give information about salaries of secondary/high school teachers in fivr countries in 2009.
The table provides information regarding the incomes of high school teachers in 2009 from five countries selected.
Overall
, these countries inform the certainty of teachers'
salary
rise that can be achieved in 2 segmented
years
of dedication
such
as in
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
year
and 15th
year
with various
years
taken to reach the maximum
salary
First
of all, the highest
salary
records come from Luxembourg with 80.000
USD
in
first
Add an article
the first
show examples
year
, 112.000 in
15th
Correct article usage
the 15th
show examples
year
and
limit
Correct article usage
a limit
show examples
139.000
Change preposition
of 139.000
show examples
USD
within 30
years
.
Second
Add an article
The second
show examples
lead is Denmark with 47.000
USD
in
year
Add an article
the year
a year
show examples
and remained steady in 15th with 7.000
USD
addition if working for more than 8
years
. The rest
such
as Australia, Korea,
Japan
Correct word choice
and Japan
show examples
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
the
salary
starting point is less than 35.000
USD
in
first
Change the article
the first
show examples
year
.
furthermore
, the average increment of
salary
in these nations does not double even after 9 to 37
years
working
Change preposition
of working
show examples
.
In addition
, Denmark and Australia state the increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
teachers' maximum
earning
Fix the agreement mistake
earnings
show examples
are attainable in 8 to 9
years
, the quickest among other countries,
eeven
Correct your spelling
even
though there is no rise after those
years
.
Submitted by imsarunn on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "such".
Vocabulary: Replace the words salary, years, first, year, usd with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • annual salary
  • gross income
  • net income
  • cost of living
  • purchasing power parity (PPP)
  • economic indicators
  • wage disparity
  • median wage
  • livable wage
  • compensation package
  • inflation rate
  • educational funding
  • professional development
  • currency exchange rates
  • teacher retention
  • standard of living
  • qualifications
  • experience level
  • tenure
  • collective bargaining
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