The table give information about salaries of secondary/high school teachers in fivr countries in 2009.

The table give information about salaries of secondary/high school teachers in fivr countries in 2009.
This
chart
elaborate
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elaborates
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the
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on the
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high school
teachers
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teachers'
teacher's
show examples
salaries
in five countries which are
Astralia
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Australia
, Denmark, Luxembourg,
Korea
, and
Jaban
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Japan
.
Overall
, Luxembourg and
korea
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Korea
show examples
teachers
have the highest maximum
salaries
,
while
Austalia
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Australia
show examples
has the lowest maximum
salaries
.
Although
Denmark and Australia have lower
years
to reach
top
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the top
show examples
salary,
but
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apply
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Korea
takes
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of
years
to reach
top
Correct article usage
the top
show examples
salary
mare
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more
show examples
than all
years
.
First,
Australia
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Australian
show examples
teachers
starting
Wrong verb form
started
show examples
with 34,600 and
then
after 15
years
raised their
salaries
to 48,00 less than Denmark
teachers
who started with 47,000 and after 15
years
they raised to 54,000. they both take
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
years
to raise the maximum salary.
While
,
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apply
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luxembourg
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Luxembourg
show examples
take the
highst
Correct your spelling
highest
of the money
by
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with
show examples
139,000 as
maximum
Add an article
a maximum
the maximum
show examples
,
then
it
comes
Add the preposition
comes to
show examples
Korea
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
84,500, the Jaban by 62,400.
Submitted by kazza735 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words teachers, salaries, korea, years with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • annual salary
  • gross income
  • net income
  • cost of living
  • purchasing power parity (PPP)
  • economic indicators
  • wage disparity
  • median wage
  • livable wage
  • compensation package
  • inflation rate
  • educational funding
  • professional development
  • currency exchange rates
  • teacher retention
  • standard of living
  • qualifications
  • experience level
  • tenure
  • collective bargaining
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