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Band 5.5

Some people think that mental strength is more important for success in sport. Some believe physical health is more important. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

#people #strength #success #sport #believe #health
In
this
 rapidly evolving world, people should be strong, mentally and physically, especially in
sport
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sports
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.Some pupils believe that players should be fortitude
,
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 because it enhances concentration, critical thinking and strategy for the game.
However
,
according to
 the other group of people, physical power is the essential factor to qualify in some particular sports. I firmly believe that
,
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 both of them are necessary for winning. In upcoming paragraphs, I will elaborate on both views with some examples.
Firstly
, there is no doubt that sportsmen should be mentally stable and stronger for competitions. Psychological stability will help
a
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an
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 athlete to concentrate and improve critical thinking during any match and make the undefeatable strategies to win even though, against a strong player as well.
For instance
,before any boxing match, coaches always see the match recordings and see the pattern of the opponent, so they can preplan, psychologically for their player.
On the other hand
, physical power is one of the biggest factors in the sports industry, usually evaluated not only in weight
,
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 but
besides
 some other factors
too
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, like strength,endurance, power and quickness.
For example
, In boxing,players need specific weight classification for qualification in any series.
According to
 "The Times of India" 70% of games in the Commonwealth are
also
 strength and endurance-based.
Secondly
, it reduces anxiety, and negative mood and improves self-esteem, which boosts your self-confidence during the interval. In conclusion, examining both perspectives, it becomes evident that all content is very important for sports.In my opinion, where mental health gives a good plan of action,
on the other hand
, muscular endurance provides self-awareness and strength to perform.
Submitted by Vanurajput22 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure clarity when presenting main points in each paragraph. Begin with a topic sentence that clearly states the main idea you will discuss.
coherence cohesion
Work on linking ideas more smoothly within and between paragraphs using a variety of cohesive devices.
task achievement
Include more specific examples or evidence to strengthen the argument presented in each paragraph.
task achievement
Make sure that your opinion is clearly stated and consistently maintained throughout the essay.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • resilience
  • focus
  • motivation
  • psychological barriers
  • stamina
  • agility
  • fortitude
  • strategy
  • physical limits
  • competition
  • sports psychologists
  • peak performance
  • competitive edge
  • fundamental aspect
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