Some people believe that money for education mainly be spent on better computers while others believe it would be better on teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Several
people
consider that education’s
Change noun form
education
money
should be spent on computers, but others think that it is better to spend on teachers
. In this
essay, I am going to discuss both sides of the argument, while
I support the latter opinion that paying to
Change preposition
apply
teachers
are
better.
On the Correct subject-verb agreement
is
first
hand, Correct word choice
other
people
believe that computer
can provide anything that they want. Through the Fix the agreement mistake
computers
computer
, every person is able to obtain information, trend
or knowledge easily and quickly. Fix the agreement mistake
trends
For instance
, if children want to know about the formulas of Mathematic, they can utilize an application on device
like Google, and even, if they want to acquire more explanation, they are able to open YouTube. Add an article
a device
the device
Besides
, young people
can see again if they forget that topic. Hence
, several people
feel spending their money
for
Change preposition
on
computer
Correct article usage
a computer
better
because something on Add a missing verb
is better
computer
can be looked Add an article
the computer
a computer
plenty
of times.
Change preposition
at plenty
On the other hand
, others think that spending the money
for
Change preposition
on
teachers
can assist a financial of them. If role
of the Add an article
the role
teachers
has been changed by computer
, every person who become
Change the verb form
becomes
as
a Change preposition
apply
teacher
does not possess an income so that
Correct word choice
apply
it
will escalate Correct pronoun usage
which
total
Correct article usage
the total
of
unemployment. Change preposition
apply
In addition
, it also
treasures the services of a teacher
. For example
, currently, many young people
study
to become Wrong verb form
are studying
as
Change preposition
apply
a
Correct article usage
apply
teacher
at university. If Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
people
still require the role of teacher
, those students will be
easier to get a job when they finish their Verb problem
find it
study
.
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
To conclude
, both arguments carry strength and significance, and neither can be refuted outright. Nevertheless
, I personally subscribe to the fact that spending money
of
education is better Change preposition
on
on
the Change preposition
for
teachers
because it can increase their economy, and this
also
cherishes their works
.Fix the agreement mistake
work
Submitted by fifi on
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coherence cohesion
To improve your essay structure, make sure to include a clear thesis statement in your introduction and restate your main points in the conclusion for a stronger impact and clearer position statement.
coherence cohesion
Increase the effectiveness of your essay by ensuring paragraphs contain a clear main idea, are well-organized and transitions are used smoothly between points and paragraphs.
task achievement
Develop your arguments further by providing more detailed examples to support your views. Be sure to elaborate on why you believe spending on teachers or computers has certain advantages or disadvantages.
task achievement
To clarify and extend your ideas, try to provide a more in-depth analysis of each viewpoint. This will show a better understanding of the complexity of the issue and enhance your argument.