Some people believe that children should be banned from using their phones during the school day. Others believe that children should be allowed to use their phones. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
Several people say that during the
school
day should be teenagers forbidden to use their gadgets whereas
the
others Correct article usage
apply
assure
that Verb problem
say
the
Correct article usage
apply
students
should be permissible using their phones
. In this
essay, I am going to discuss both sides of the argument, while
I support the first opinion that kids are banned Correct word choice
apply
to utilize
their Change preposition
from utilizing
phones
.
On the first
hand, I would argue that Correct word choice
other
children
should not use their phones
during the school
day. If the students
bring their gadgets to the
Correct article usage
apply
school
, this
matter will bother their learning activities because they are going to prefer using their phone
for playing games than for studying. Fix the agreement mistake
phones
For instance
, presently, many assorted games that
are Correct pronoun usage
apply
easy
downloaded on Change the word
easily
the
Correct article usage
apply
phones
, and is
easy to Correct subject-verb agreement
are
be accessed
so that Wrong verb form
access
the
Correct article usage
apply
children
will be more attracted playing
games on their gadgets than studying. Change preposition
to playing
Additionally
, teenagers are going to be less focus
Replace the word
focused
to study
, and it is able to decrease their value of subjects at Change preposition
on studying
school
.
On the other hand
, some people allow the
Correct article usage
apply
children
using
their Change the verb form
to use
phones
. Perhaps they feel that the students
will be assisted if they bring their phones
to the school
for
Change preposition
to
making
the Verb problem
help
children
easy to find the
information and increase their knowledge. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, if the students
do an assignment, and they feel difficulties, they are going to find on the internet an explanation of their duty.
To conclude
, after weighing up both sides of the argument, I prefer that the
Correct article usage
apply
children
should be prohibited to use
their Change preposition
from using
phones
at school
because this
is able to interrupt the
Correct article usage
apply
consentration
and their focus on studying.Correct your spelling
concentration
Submitted by fifi on
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coherence cohesion
Be mindful of structure and transitions within paragraphs. Enhance the logical flow of ideas by using a wider range of linking words and phrases.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear introduction and conclusion, stating your opinion explicitly in both sections for emphasis and clarity.
coherence cohesion
Support main points with more detailed and relevant examples or evidence. Vague statements do not provide a strong argument.
task achievement
Make certain that you respond completely to all parts of the task. Consider the implications and counter-arguments for a more comprehensive response.
task achievement
Strive for clarity in presenting your ideas. Each paragraph should have one clear main idea, and all subsequent sentences should elaborate on that idea.
task achievement
Use specific and detailed examples to substantiate your points. Avoid generalizations that do not add depth to your argument.