Unhealthy eating has a negative effect on both individuals and the society in which they live. Some people think that the government should tax unhealthy foods while others believe that a ‘fat tax’ is unfair and unnecessary. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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In our contemporary era, more and more people consume unhealthy
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

without any self-control.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

phenomenon brings negative impacts to both individuals and
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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society. To be able to resolve
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

issue more effectively, some think that the government should
tax
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

unhealthy
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, but some opine that it is unjust and not essential.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay will examine both views and
weighs
Correct subject-verb agreement
weigh

It seems that the verb weighs does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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up
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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its
Correct pronoun usage
their

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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merits. On one hand, we live in a world where we get to enjoy our freedom. We should have the
rights
Fix the agreement mistake
right

It seems that rights may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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to do and eat everything we love. If the 'fat
tax
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

' is imposed, it will mean that certain
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

food
Fix the agreement mistake
foods

It seems that food may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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will be more expensive. Some people might not be able to enjoy their favourite
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

as
frequent
Change the word
frequently

Frequent seems to be the wrong part of speech for this context.

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as they used to
due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

budget
contraints
Correct your spelling
constraints

If you don’t want contraints to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it might not have much impact
for
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the rich. Some people
therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

think that imposing
'fat
Correct article usage
a 'fat

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
tax
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

' is unjust and unnecessary.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it is undeniable that
tax
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is one of the most effective ways to resolve
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

issue as
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals

It seems that individual may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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can feel the immediate effect. They will think twice before they purchase
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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unhealthy
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

because it is more expensive than
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
healthy
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the rich might not be affected directly
but
Remove the conjunction
apply

It appears that the word but is unnecessary in this sentence. Consider removing it.

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they are likely to change their diet style too if their cycle of friends
change
Correct subject-verb agreement
changes

It seems that the verb change does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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theirs.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, if their friends
decided
Wrong verb form
decide

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb decided. Consider changing it.

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not to dine at
McDonald
Change noun form
McDonald's

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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because of their price, the rich will have to follow the crowd too. The
governmnet
Correct your spelling
government

If you don’t want governmnet to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

can
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

organise health campaigns, but the truth is it will not be as effective as imposing
'fat
Correct article usage
a 'fat

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
tax
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

', as the public generally will not 'feel the pain until the fire is near'.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, my view is that imposing
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

tax
Add an article
the tax
a tax

The noun phrase tax seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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is the most effective way to prevent
illness
Fix the agreement mistake
illnesses

It seems that illness may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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like obesity, high cholesterol,
stoke
Correct your spelling
stroke

The word stoke doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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and other life-threatening diseases. These diseases will turn out to be an
enourmous
Correct your spelling
enormous

If you don’t want enourmous to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

burden to the
health care
Correct your spelling
healthcare

The word health care seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

show examples
system.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure introduction and conclusion are distinct and clearly summarize the main points of the essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay should have a clear logical structure with well-organized paragraphs. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea and be connected with transitions.
coherence cohesion
Main points should be expanded with specific examples and further explanation to strengthen the argument.
task achievement
Fully address all parts of the task, providing a balanced discussion of both views and your own opinion, while ensuring relevance throughout.
task achievement
Ideas should be clear, relevant, and supported by evidence or examples. Try to delve deeper into the implications the 'fat tax' would have on society and include a broader range of perspectives and consequences.
task achievement
Include specific examples to illustrate points where possible. These examples will help in demonstrating a clear understanding of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Government intervention
  • Taxation
  • Public health outcomes
  • Revenue
  • Reinvested
  • Health education programs
  • Level the playing field
  • Regressive
  • Low-income individuals
  • Governmental overreach
  • Infringing
  • Personal freedom
  • Education about healthy eating
  • Subsidizing
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