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Writing Samples
Band 7

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employee rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What is the disadvantage of being self-employee?

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Being an entrepreneur is a dream for many
people
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. The desire to own a
business
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 or organization has grown a lot in recent years. There are many reasons why
people
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 choose self-employment, but it
also
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 has its downsides. Today, many
people
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 choose to be self-employed rather than working for someone else. One of the main reasons is the flexibility in working hours. As a
business
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owner
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, you can create your own schedule without being tied to a set work time. Another advantage is that all the profits go to the
owner
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, unlike
being
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apply
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an employee who receives a salary.
This
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 gives a sense of independence.
Also
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, self-employment allows
people
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 to put their time and energy into building something of their own,
instead
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 of working for others.
However
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, self-employment
also
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 has some challenges.
First,
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the
owner
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 has many responsibilities. They have to take care of everything in the
business
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, from making a profit to paying salaries. Sometimes,
people
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 can't handle these responsibilities and end up facing problems.
For example
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, my uncle opened a small shop in our village, but after a few months, it started to lose money. He even thought about harming himself because of the stress. Thankfully, he is okay now. Another issue is that the
owner
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's income depends on how well the
business
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 is doing. Unlike a regular job where you get a fixed salary, a
business
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owner
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 may not earn a steady income, and it can sometimes be hard to get by. In conclusion, being self-employed seems like a great idea, but it comes with many struggles. Some
people
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 succeed,
while
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 others face difficulties. If you're willing to take the risk, go for it. But if you prefer a safer path, it might be better to stick with a regular job.

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task achievement
Try to provide more in-depth analysis or explanation regarding the reasons for self-employment and the challenges it brings.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to organize your points clearly and ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea.
task achievement
Consider adding a counterargument or a more detailed example to support your points further.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction clearly presents the topic and sets the stage for the discussion.
task achievement
You've provided personal experiences which make your argument more relatable and engaging.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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