the map shows developments, which took place in the bookstore between 2000 and now.

The map shows a comparison of bookstore developments from 2000 to and nowadays. Generally, they rearranged most of the

books

Use synonyms

' placement and

also

Linking Words

the facilities

itself

Correct pronoun usage

themselves

show examples

However

Linking Words

, there are several things that remained the same.

It is clear that

Linking Words

the fiction

books

Use synonyms

section from 2002 already changed into

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

4 different sections of genres, which are art, hobbies, cookery and travel.

Then

Linking Words

on the right side, they renovated the fiction

books

Use synonyms

section into a non-fiction one.

Moreover

Linking Words

, the current tables were used to be places for three types of

book

Fix the agreement mistake

books

show examples

Not to mention

Linking Words

, they

also

Linking Words

replaced the

non-fiction's

Change noun form

non-fiction

show examples

section

into

Change preposition

with

show examples

a Cafe. But , there are three places that remained the same which are the travel

books

Use synonyms

, the latest

books

Use synonyms

, and the service desk.

Not to mention

Linking Words

, the entrance still

start

Change the verb form

starts

show examples

in the same place and direction.

bmaharani04

Jan 22, 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, not to mention".

▼

Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.

▼

Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.

▼

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words books with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.

▼

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

2 paragraphs

137 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

depicts
changes
occurred
transformations
developments
span
visual
comparison
illustrates

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the map shows developments, which took place in the bookstore between 2000 and now.

Nowadays people use social media to keep in touch with others and be aware of news. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

These days it is much easier for many people to travel to different countries for tourism than in the past. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Nowadays a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctors. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Many criminals reoffened after they have been punished. Why do some people contribute to commit crimes after they have been punished, and What measures can be taken to tackle this problem?