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Band 5.5

There are many types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

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Recent research shows that
music
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 is not only entertainment but
also
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 beneficial for a view of health. Nowadays, there are lots of
music
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 types,
for example
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, the traditional
music
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 types are still continuing to their popularity against international
music
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. Whatever the
music
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 type is, it is certain that the
music
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 helps us to feel different feelings and remember the past. In
this
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 article, I will give you various thoughts and examples about
this
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 issue.
Firstly
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, it is obvious that the traditional
music
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 type is one of the unchangeable parts of our culture and we are familiar with their melodies that feel deserve feelings.
For example
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, it is valuable that we express our different behaviours with
music
Use synonyms
such
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 as sorrows, joys and pains.
In addition
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 to
this
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, it is true that the traditional song which we hear remembers our memories and emotions. It is very important that
music
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 has a reparative power, particularly in traditional
music
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.
Moreover
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,
as a result
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 of the globalisation world, international
music
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 stands out in our habitat. Over the past ten years, we have easily reached songs which we want to listen to and do not know in the past on the web and listen to them.
Although
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 it may not give us pleasure, It is possible to find various lyrics and melodies,
for example
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, we can reach and listen to new songs which belong to Madonna, Jackson and many others. Today, it shows us many different views that listen to them in
such
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 a quick way. In conclusion, it is evident that
music
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 continues to play a significant role in shaping our lives. In my opinion,
music
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 is one of the parts of our lives, especially the traditional
music
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.
Although
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 I think many
music
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 types influence themselves, the traditional
music
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 type will continue to progress its life forever.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure the essay has a clear and logical structure with well-defined paragraphs, each presenting a single main idea. Consider using more signpost language to improve the flow.
coherence cohesion
In your introduction and conclusion, make sure to restate the topic and your main argument more clearly to enhance readability and understanding.
coherence cohesion
Develop your main points with more detailed examples and explanations to fully support your argument, creating a more engaging and comprehensive essay.
task achievement
Aim to address all parts of the question fully, giving equal attention to each point. In your answer, include a balanced discussion of both the importance of music in general and the comparison between the value of traditional and international music.
task achievement
Use specific examples to back up your statements and provide a more thorough analysis of the topic. Examples help to illustrate your points and make them more convincing to the reader.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • emotional release
  • cultural significance
  • globalization
  • cultural exchange
  • technology
  • preservation
  • cultural heritage
  • social cohesion
  • expression
  • consumption
  • production
  • traditional music
  • international music
  • diversity
  • identity
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