The bar charts below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers.

IELTS Writing Task Chart for The bar charts below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers.

The figures below give information about why different

people

Use synonyms

are at university and

also

Linking Words

the support that they have received when they start their careers.

Overall

Linking Words

, we can notice that most

people

Use synonyms

are studying because they want to succeed in a career, and the younger ones are those who received more help.

Firstly

Linking Words

, the first bar chart clearly shows that younger students, once they have finished their studies, aim to find a job. We can see that it is the case for

people

Use synonyms

between 26 and 39

years

Use synonyms

old.

Then

Linking Words

, for students between 40 and 49

years

Use synonyms

old, there are half of them want to manage a career

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

the other half are studying for interest. And,

finally

Linking Words

, 70% of older persons, who are

people

Use synonyms

over 49

years

Use synonyms

old, are at university for interest and only 20% to find a new job.

Next,

Linking Words

we can discover from the second bar graph that the more

students

Correct word order

young students

show examples

are

Correct pronoun usage

there are

show examples

young

Correct word order

apply

show examples

, the more employers will support them. Indeed, 60% of persons under 26 received help with fees or time off,

while

Linking Words

for those who are between 40 and 49

years

Use synonyms

old, the rate is only 30%.

santos_dij

Jan 22, 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words people, years with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

192 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

age groups
career advancement
personal development
employer support
external aid
correlation
intrinsic motivation
career enhancement
societal impacts
workforce development
lifelong learning
primary reasons
motivation for study
part-time studies
career-oriented
personal interest
educational pursuit
study motivation

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some people think studying in groups is better, while some think self-studying is better for school students. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Everyone knows that education is necessary to live a better and sensible life. So every society emphasize differernt matothods of studying. But there is also a difference of opinion about studying alone or studying in groups.
6.5
band
Caring for children is very important for our society. Therefore all mother's and father's should take a child care training course. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is how some new families prepare their own knowledge about child care. Parents should look after children at an early stage of life. I hardly agree position, because when people take a course of care, they are able to solve some problems without any barriers. In this essay, I am going to analyse the subject in detail and support it with my own experience.
7.5
band
Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Some would argue that specialists have finished their programs such as medicine, science, engineering…etc. They should be required to work in the same country they trained in because some countries invest a huge amount of money in this training, l believe that they should have the right to choose where they live and work because might this be a great opportunity for them to gain valuable experiences from different countries.
7.5
band
Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people, while others beilieve that the purpose of the museums is to educate. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
The discussion about whether museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people or institutions focused on education raises a thorny question. Although it can be argued that museums should primarily serve to educate visitors, I strongly believe that they should also be enjoyable and entertaining to engage a wider audience and foster a love for learning. There are several reasons why people think museums should be educational. First and foremost, it could be argued that the primary role of museums is to preserve and present historical, cultural, and scientific artefacts. It would appear that focusing on education ensures that museums fulfil their mission of increasing public knowledge and awareness. Educational exhibits allow visitors to gain a deeper understanding of various subjects, such as ancient civilizations, natural history, and technological advancements. Viewed from this angle, museums serve as valuable educational resources that contribute to the intellectual developme...
7
band
In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.
high school students who already graduated are recommended to take a gap year before entering college. Working and travelling are suggested activities to do during that moment. This essay will suggest that having spare time to pick the right major before college is the biggest advantage of this, but losing your self-control because of these enjoyable activities is the primary disadvantage.

The bar charts below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers.

Some people think studying in groups is better, while some think self-studying is better for school students. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Caring for children is very important for our society. Therefore all mother's and father's should take a child care training course. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people, while others beilieve that the purpose of the museums is to educate. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.