Some people think that the goverment should strictly control the supply of fresh water, as it is a limited resource , while others it should not be regulated. Discuss both the sides and give your opinion
It is often believed that limited fresh
water
should be controlled by the Use synonyms
government
Use synonyms
whereas
some Linking Words
people
are pessimistic about Use synonyms
this
intervention and support the unlimited distribution of Linking Words
water
. I partially agree with Use synonyms
this
, for its growing demand in the rise of population in some countries regardless of the advancement of technology, which ensures its sufficiency in the future.
On the one hand, the Linking Words
government
should play a crucial role in regulating the amount of Use synonyms
water
distributed to individuals when there is a severe shortage of fresh Use synonyms
water
in countries whose population rises dramatically. Use synonyms
In other words
, there are more Linking Words
people
who are unable to access clean Use synonyms
water
as it is consumed at an accelerating speed to support more Use synonyms
people
's lives in modern society. Use synonyms
For instance
, the insufficiency of Linking Words
water
is intense in many developing countries Use synonyms
such
as India and Kenya where more Linking Words
people
rely on clean Use synonyms
water
for drinking, bathing, and even treating those who suffer from diseases and injuries. Use synonyms
Therefore
, the lack of supervision of Linking Words
water
from authorities can escalate concerns over health, promoting the death rate resulting from dehydration Use synonyms
as well as
infection, all of which should encourage national leaders to take an active approach.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, Linking Words
the
regulation from the Correct article usage
apply
government
is not always necessary because of the increasing amount of Use synonyms
water
being stored Use synonyms
due to
the sophisticated technology available today. Indeed, the advanced filtering system called "Jyosui" has been introduced to raise the supply of drinking Linking Words
water
by removing any tiny particles from contaminated Use synonyms
water
. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, more fresh Linking Words
water
has been preserved in Use synonyms
water
plants for an emergency to ensure the safety of the public. Use synonyms
Thus
, Linking Words
such
a sustainable way to produce clean Linking Words
water
has already been established, reducing the need for control from the Use synonyms
government
.
In conclusion, I somewhat agree with the Use synonyms
government
's intervention in Use synonyms
water
distribution to ensure that it is well provided to those who are in need. Use synonyms
However
, the rapid progress of technology has increased the supply of drinking Linking Words
water
, making the role of authority less significant.Use synonyms
Submitted by mizuho on
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task achievement
Your task response is strong, as you address both sides of the argument and provide your opinion. However, try to further elaborate on your viewpoint to make it clearer how you partially agree with both sides.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Make sure to keep paragraphs distinct with one main idea each to enhance clarity.
task achievement
You provide relevant and specific examples, such as the situation in India and Kenya and the description of the 'Jyosui' system.
coherence cohesion
Your logical structure is effective, leading the reader through your arguments in a cohesive manner.