Some think schools should rewards students who have the best academic results, while others think it’s more important to reward students who achieve other types of success (such as sports, music, and good behavior). Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#think #schools #rewards #students #results #it’s #reward #success #sports #music #behavior

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There is no denying the fact that school rewards contribute positively toward

students

. Some people think that it is more valuable to reward

students

with distinct academic performance,

while

others believe it is more important to reward

students

with other types of success: sports, music, good behaviour, etc.

This

essay will analyse both points of view and express my opinion. On one hand, rewarding pupils for their academic achievements

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

students

excel in their studies.

Thus

, they will help their brain to grow healthily.

In other words

, academic subjects cover necessary subjects that stimulate

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

brain growth and prepare youngsters for a bright future.

For example

, if a teacher appreciates the academic achievements of

students

they will encourage the low-grade

students

to do their best.

On the other hand

, rewarding school kids based on other types of success could encourage them to identify their strengths and hobbies. It will

also

help them excel and develop their character.

For instance

, if a student is doing poorly in a specific subject they will still be confident in another. So

this

allows all

students

to be successful and distribute their achievements evenly.

This

will create a healthy and positive environment that encourages everyone.

To conclude

, there is a conflict in ideas about prioritizing rewards for

students

whether they should be based on academic performance or other types of success. I completely stand with the latter opinion because every student is different and

this

will help all

students

with different talents to do their best and be appreciated for that.

Submitted by archmaha.14 on Mon Jan 22 2024

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coherence cohesion

To improve coherence and cohesion, try to use a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas across sentences and paragraphs effectively. Work on the logical flow of your argument, ensuring that each point leads naturally to the next.

task achievement

Clarify your main points with distinct topic sentences and make sure each body paragraph has a clear central idea. Offer expanded explanations and develop your arguments further to ensure comprehensive coverage of the topic.

task achievement

Incorporate more specific examples to illustrate your points. This will strengthen your argument and demonstrate your understanding of the topic. Use examples from real-life situations, studies or personal experiences to make your essay more convincing.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

256 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Scholastic achievement
Intellectual effort
Merit-based
Academic excellence
Educational outcomes
Well-rounded development
Multiple intelligences
Fosters self-esteem
Extracurricular involvement
Personal growth
Holistic approach
Diverse talents
Societal implications

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Some think schools should rewards students who have the best academic results, while others think it’s more important to reward students who achieve other types of success (such as sports, music, and good behavior). Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Should netflix and other online services' contents will be censored. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?

Some people say that advertising has positive economic effects. Others think it has negative social effects because it will make people feel dissatisfied with who they are and what they have. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

some people work for the same organisation all their working life. others think that it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

'It is often argued that children must be protected from unsuitable material on TV and the Internet by government censorship. Others say that this is the parents' responsibility to control what their children do and watch. To what extent do you think that this is true?

How important is the dress code in our lives? Do you consider that dressing appropriately is important or are you of the opinion that everyone should be able to wear exactly what they like?