In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

In many regions across the globe, there is a gain in population of people in the city than the countryside. In my opinion, I think
this
issue has both a positive and negative development in terms of employability, lifestyle and the development of a country. The benefit of moving to the city
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
is mainly because there are better job opportunities.
However
, a well-paid job comes with a required standard and in return, people are offered a healthier working environment
along with
a well-paying career.
This
will
then
allow the citizens to spend on an improved living space as well.
However
, to achieve
this
opportunity, training and extra education may be required.
As a result
, not only will the citizens earn a good income, but the country will
also
earn a number of educated people.
In contrast
, the countryside may be facing major problems
due to
a lack of labour.
For instance
, if agriculture is an important growing aspect for a country,
then
the reduction of harvest will lead to little to no local products for the market.
Hence
, the farmers will lose their jobs. As for the government earning sector, there will
also
be a decrease in incomes that are always generated from farming.
Consequently
, the farmer won’t be able to afford their living anymore. In conclusion, not only does the city offer a higher level of education, but it
also
provides great employment opportunities which can lead to an upgraded lifestyle.
However
, the countryside might be facing several risks
such
as a lack of farmers, a drop in local products and poverty.
Submitted by movya_ly on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present
Ensure that the introduction clearly presents the topic and your viewpoint. The current introduction is a bit vague. In the conclusion, restate your position more clearly to strengthen the argument.
relevant specific examples
Expand on your ideas with specific examples to support each point you make. This will help in showing the full development of your argument and increase the task response score.
logical structure
Improve the logical flow by ensuring that each paragraph flows naturally from one to the other. Transition sentences can help in achieving a more cohesive essay.
clear comprehensive ideas
Develop your main points further by delving deeper into the practical implications and consequences of rural-to-urban migration. Expanding on your ideas can help in achieving a higher score for task achievement and coherence.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • rural-to-urban migration
  • population shift
  • positive impact
  • negative impact
  • urbanization
  • job opportunities
  • access to education
  • access to healthcare
  • urban infrastructure
  • rural traditions
  • cultural heritage
What to do next:
Look at other essays: