Some Young People are leaving the countryside to live in towns and cities, leaving only old people in the countryside. What problems are caused by this issue? What can be done to solve this situation?

Currently, most of the youth
generation
are moving from the
countryside
to live in
cities
and
towns
,
thus
the elder
people
are left behind in the
countryside
.
This
situation is happening because young
people
are more eager to explore new
places
and if they move they can easily find interesting
places
in
cities
to hang out rather than the
countryside
. These problems can be solved by teaching or letting them know that they can do many
fun
activities without leaving their current
places
. Nowadays, some young
people
have a huge interest in exploring new
places
. Since their
generation
is already surrounded by the rapid growth of social media. They now become more familiar with
places
that they have not visited yet.
For example
, there was a person who had been living in the
countryside
since he was born, until he saw one of the videos on social media, about how amazing life is in metropolitan areas.
Then
, when he already managed his money, he chose to move out from his current house in the
countryside
. So it can be said that some
people
might be curious about living in a huge city,with lots of buildings.
Furthermore
, the young
generation
can hardly find
fun
activities in the
countryside
. Since in the
countryside
Add a comma
countryside,
show examples
there are not likely to be malls or amusement parks, like the the ones in the
cities
. Even though the
countryside
is more peaceful than in the
cities
, young
people
tend to like exciting crowded
places
, like going to a party.
Thus
, in the
countryside
Add a comma
countryside,
show examples
people
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
rarely
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
find a club that offers
this
kind of event.
That is
why, young citizens prefer to live in the
cities
because they think it is more
fun
. In order to tackle these problems, the older
people
can tell or teach the young
generation
that living in the
countryside
is as
fun
as living in
towns
. I believe the elder
people
who live in the
countryside
are more experienced and know many
places
in the
countryside
better than young
people
. They can teach them that they can have
fun
without moving to
towns
, like telling them to explore more in nature
such
as beaches, lakes,
mountains
Correct word choice
and mountains
show examples
. With
this
action, young
people
can reconsider their choices about moving out.
To sum up
, some of the young
people
are leaving their current house which is the
countryside
to live in
towns
and
cities
,
then
the elderly
people
are left behind in the
countryside
.
This
can be happening because young
people
have a huge interest in exploring new
places
and if they move they can easily find interesting
places
in
cities
to hang out rather than the
countryside
. In order to solve these problems, it can be teaching or letting them know that they can do many
fun
activities without leaving their current
places
.
Submitted by bmaharani04 on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
Expand your introduction and conclusion to make them more comprehensive. Include a brief outline of the problems and solutions in the introduction, and reinforce these with a summary in the conclusion.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

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  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

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  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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