Nowadays some high-school graduates travel or work for a period of time instead of going directly to study at university. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
Taking a
gap
year
after graduate
from Wrong verb form
graduating
a
high school has been becoming increasingly popular in recent years. Correct article usage
apply
While
this
year
may expand teenager's
Change noun form
teenagers'
horizon
, Fix the agreement mistake
horizons
negative
impacts of Correct article usage
the negative
this
trend outweigh the positive effects, since students may lose their academic momentum, moreover
waste their money
.
One of the reasons why youngsters may be affected badly is being far away from education may distract their focus. Young adults tend to travel or work during gap
year
in order to broaden their horizons; Fix the agreement mistake
years
however
, as they quit to study, they are likely to forget the requirements of being a successful student, including working long hours. Furthermore
, if they prefer to work over the gap
year
, they able
to earn Add a missing verb
are able
money
for their effort, unfortunately
their focus on studying may be distracted by earning Add the comma(s)
unfortunately,
money
. As a result
of this
approach, studying math or chemistry as a student may seem meaningless, it is because they do not earn money
by learning a math formula. Therefore
, high-school graduates would not be eager to turn back to college after a gap
year
, since they lose their study disciple
, and are distracted during a Correct your spelling
discipline
year-off
.
Correct your spelling
year off
On the other hand
, a year
, which is spent for
Change preposition
on
traveling
may put Change the spelling
travelling
strain
on Add an article
a strain
individual's
budget. The importance of touching new cultures by travelling is undeniable, Correct article usage
an individual's
whereas
this
process would be overpriced for some. To clarify, flight tickets, accomodations
costs, and other expenses related to Correct your spelling
accommodation
accommodations
journey
may affect people's budget, considering they do not have Correct article usage
the journey
salary
, their parents may face some difficulties in affording their expenditures. Add an article
a salary
For example
, the cost of one-
Correct your spelling
one year
year
travel across the continent of Europe almost doubled the price of one-
Correct article usage
a one-year
year
university education. Spending their saving on traveling
would seem wasting to low-income families. Change the spelling
travelling
In other words
, pupils may benefit from their parent's saving by spending on their education, instead
of traveling
.
Change the spelling
travelling
To conclude
, taking a gap
year
may develop Correct article usage
an adolescant's
adolescant's
perspectives by Correct your spelling
adolescent's
adolescents
traveling
, and learning Change the spelling
travelling
different
Add an article
a different
culture
. Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
However
, this
process may result in a lose
of academic momentum, and Replace the word
loss
also
wasting their parent's saving
. Fix the agreement mistake
savings
Desicion
of whether Correct your spelling
Decision
taking
a Change the verb form
to take
year-off
should be evaluated Correct your spelling
year off
according to
pupil's
own circumstances and Correct article usage
the pupil's
their
financial status.Correct pronoun usage
apply
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structure
Ensure that you have a clear introduction stating the topic and your opinion, followed by body paragraphs that each cover a single main idea with appropriate supporting details, and a conclusion that summarizes the discussion and restates your stance. Avoid introducing new ideas in the conclusion.
cohesion
Work on varying your sentence structures and using cohesive devices effectively to link ideas not only within paragraphs but also between them. This will enhance the flow of your essay.
development
Provide more specific examples to support your arguments. Examples help to illustrate your points and make them more convincing. Remember to tie the examples directly back to the question prompt.
task response
Make sure to answer all parts of the prompt thoroughly. In this case, discuss some clear advantages to balance your argument, ensuring that the essay addresses whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages or not.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?